Of Fire and Ice
by rika195
Summary: I never knew so much could change in a single day of misfortune. All I know is that I'll never be the same. So I run on the wind with my wings of fire and ice, and look for the one my heart loves. Does she still love me? [Takato's love story]
1. I'll Take You Back

_ Of Fire And Ice_

_By rika195_

_Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon, Takato, Jeri, Rika, or anyone else from Digimon for that matter._

_However, this story, this plot, and the fantasy characters are my own._

_I hope you will enjoy this mystery/fantasy/love story._

_(------) _

_I never knew that so much could change in a single day and night of misfortune. _

_But whether this change was for good or ill, I have not yet decided. All I know is that I will never be the same._

_Nor can I ever go back._

_From now on, I will run on the wind with my wings of fire and ice, and search for the one my heart loves. Will she love me as I have loved her? Will she still remember me from all that time ago? I cannot know. At least, not until I find her._

_Let me go back a ways, to when this all first began. So that my story may be understood._

_(------)_


	2. One Slip And I Fall

It all began on that field trip to Mt. Fuji. I was 15 years old at the time. It still amazes me that one simple slip can change the out come of destiny. Or is it destiny that causes the slip?

How can I ever know?

I, like the rest of my class, had made completely sure that my permission slip was filled out and signed by my parents, allowing me to go on the field trip to Mt. Fuji that day. It is so much more enjoyable to spend an autumn day outside than to stay cooped up in the classroom. And that day was such a beautiful day too.

Kazu and Kenta sat behind me in the bus as they usually did, laughing and talking loudly to each other about this and that. We always sat in the back of the bus, because the popular people sat up in the front and got to get off first. But we never minded. In the back, we could talk about the digital world without fear of being laughed at by the popular kids. The cheerleading girls were giggling in the front, sitting either four to one seat or on their boyfriend's laps. I always found that amusing. Why they would enjoy being squashed together is still a mystery to me. Their excuse is always that they're cold. So I, and everyone else in my group of friends, usually ignored the popular side of the bus.

At least, that was what used to happen. One day, Jeri's gymnastics had proven their point, and she was invited to join the cheerleading squad. We encouraged her to do it because, as Kazu put it, "they need someone cool to make those popular girls look bad." We all knew she really wanted to join, but she didn't want us to feel like she was leaving our group. But we made sure to tell her that that would never happen.

And so she had joined. Within a few months, she seemed to forget all about us. She got popular really fast, and then never had time for the rest of us.

So now she sat in the front, and I still sat in the back, waiting for her to remember that I existed. Instead, she sat on one of the seats with three other girls, giggling about jokes I couldn't hear. Often I watched her, or talked to her in passing at school, but either she pretended I didn't exist, or she simply smiled. But that was all. I wasn't anything to her anymore.

Kazu was speaking to me about something, but instead of listening, I watched Jeri with a jealous ache in my heart. Suzuki, the most popular boy in our class, was talking to her. Flirting with her. And she was flirting back.

"Takato?" Kazu waved his hand in front of my face. It got my attention, and I turned to him with a slight frown. I didn't have to tell him what I was thinking about. He rolled his eyes and sighed loudly. "Don't even pay attention to her Takato," he said with some distaste in his voice. "She is always with Suzuki these days. They're always like that. Last time on the bus, she sat in his lap." Kazu rolled his eyes, and then glanced at me with an apologetic face. "Sorry," he mumbled, seeing that mention of Jeri sitting in stuck up Suzuki's lap made me sick. "I keep forgetting that you still like her."

I crossed my arms and sighed, staring out the window at the road as we sped up the mountain to the place of our field trip. "I don't just 'like' her Kazu!" I complained. "I _love _her!"

"But Takato," Kenta reasoned, pushing his hair out of his face. He was always the practical one, and never failed to point out when we were exaggerating. He had switched from wearing glasses to contacts, and the outcome was that he looked less like a geek. We teased him all the time, saying the girls would probably be all over him, but he started wearing his glasses again because of it. So we reassured him and apologized till he felt comfortable wearing contacts again. Today he wore contacts, and the open window next to his head was letting in a blast of cold air that ruffled his black hair. I smiled secretly to myself, thinking that he did look much better than he used to, and wished I could tease him about being good looking again. But I knew that he hated that. So I kept my mouth shut.

"You're only 15. You can't possibly know what love is until you've matured enough. You're not ready to get married, so you're not ready for love. Just say 'like a lot' and you'll be more accurate." Kenta said all this with a straight face, and both Kazu and I tried very hard not to laugh.

"If what Takato has for Jeri isn't love, than I don't know what is," Kazu teased. "He's been crazy about her since he met her in….I don't know….kindergarten or something."

I rolled my eyes and gave Kazu's shoulder a punch. "It was _not _kindergarten. Dork. It was first grade. And can we quite talking about me as if I weren't here?"

"I wasn't," Kenta said with a yawn. "Are we there yet? My bottom hurts from sitting for so long."

Before I could open my mouth to reply, a loud popping sound split the noise in the bus, and our ride suddenly became a whole lot bumpier. Slowly, the bus slowed down and pulled over to the side of the road. The talking in the bus had ceased, and everyone was looking out the window to see what was happening.

Our driver jumped out, muttering a few four letter words I refuse to write, and went to inspect the damage. One of the tired had blown, and we were stuck on the side of the road, half way up Mt. Fuji. What were we, the school kids supposed to do? Sit around and wait for the tire to be fixed? Of course not! We filed out of the bus as quickly as we can, and decided to take a look around. Our teachers congregated around the bus driver to discuss what was to be done, while Kazu, Kenta and I went to the edge of the road and looked down.

We stood in awe and the sight below us, our mouths hanging open. "Wow," I whispered. I usually tend to be quiet when I am surprised. Kazu, on the other hand, makes sure everyone within a hundred blocks can hear him. Kenta just says nothing at all. "Wow," I repeated, staring at the awful sight. "We're really high up!"

And so we were. A couple thousand feet I should say. The edge of the road had a railing, so that we wouldn't fall, but after the tiny fencing there was nothing but a thousand-foot drop into a rocky abyss below, to which we couldn't see the bottom. Talk about scary. We could see tall evergreen trees below us, but their tops didn't reach us. That scared us too.

"Sheesh!" Kazu yelled, his voice suddenly found. "Wouldn't want to fall down there!" His voice attracted some of the other students, and they peered over the edge in fright. "You aren't frightened," Kazu winked at me.

I stared down at the terrible cliff with wide eyes, unable to move from my spot for fear of falling. "Scared?" I asked? Thankfully my voice did not quiver with my nervous, anxious fear that I did indeed feel. I was so afraid of heights… "No," I lied. "Just awed."

Kazu nodded slyly. He could see right through me. "Okay then…." He stepped backwards, giving me some space, and then leapt at me in a mock attempt to knock me over. I jumped probably three feet into the air, landed on my back on the road, and then stood up angrily. He laughed good-naturedly. "No, just awed," he teased. "Yeah right! You were so scared you almost peed your pants!" he laughed some more.

"Cut it out Kazu!" I yelled, my anger ending in relief that I hadn't fallen, and that I was away from the edge. My adrenalin rush had been so great that I felt sick. "That's not true. You just startled me. And anyway, who wouldn't be afraid if someone came up behind them and almost knocked them into a bottomless abyss?"

"It's not bottomless Takato…."

"Whatever Kenta." I sighed and tried to slow my fast-beating heart. My eyes strayed as they always did over to Jeri, and I wondered if she had noticed me. I didn't care if she thought I was a wimp, or even if she simply scorned me. I just wanted her to notice me. I stared at her a long time, ignoring Kazu and Kenta as they broke into a harmless argument about it being a bottomless cliff or not, until finally, she turned and looked my way.

In her eyes was nothing. It was like she felt nothing when she looked at me. I was a background person, and she was looking right through me as if I wasn't there. I sucked up my courage, determined not to give up, and walked up to her. I felt the disdaining look from the cheerleading girls as I came up to them, and the haughty look of challenge in Suzuki's face as he turned his gaze upon me. Jeri simply stared at me like I was a stranger and an embarrassment to her.

But I ignored all that and gave Jeri one of my most friendly smiles. "Tough luck huh?" I asked casually, as if it were only the two of us standing there. "Looks like we'll be here a while."

Jeri stared at me strangely, and I could tell that she wanted me to go away. Suzuki chuckled, and placed a hand on my shoulder. "You're not trying to make a hit on my girl now are you Takato?"

I turned my head and gave him and disgusted look, trying to cover it up with a smile. "I'm surprised you even know my name," I said sarcastically. "But I'm not talking to you am I?" I turned back to Jeri. "I'm talking to Jeri. Because unlike you, she is my friend."

"I seriously doubt it," Suzuki chuckled, a dangerous challenge in his voice. "Don't say something you'll regret Takato."

I ignored him. "So Jeri," I said, shoving Suzuki's hand off my shoulder. "How come you haven't come to hang out with the rest of us in a while? We've missed you."

Jeri bit her lip, looking anxious, and shrugged. Tanako, the lead cheerleader, leaned into my face with a sneer. "Because, idiot, Jeri is cool and popular, unlike you and your little group, and has better friends now. She hangs out with us."

I raised my eyebrow, an amused expression on my face. I could feel nearly everyone's eyes on me, and an intense silence. The only people speaking were us. "Better friends?" I asked dubiously. I glanced at Jeri. "Really? So where does that put the rest of us?"

"Look, we're done talking to you. So why don't you just go hang out with your two dim-wit friends over there." Tanako pointed in the direction of Kazu and Kenta, and glared at me as if I was being rude to her.

I sighed, and looked at Jeri with a disappointed look. "So that's how it is? I don't exist any more? Is that it?" I tried to ignore Kazu's not so subtle motions for me to just get out of there before I made a fool of myself. "We've always been here for you Jeri, when you needed us. I've always been there for you." By the look in her eyes, I know she knew what I was talking about. She remembered our experience together in the digital world. She remembered the D-Reaper. Just as well as I did. "I guess that doesn't matter any more to you." I stepped backwards, shrugging in defeat. "Have it your way. I just wanted to make sure we were still friends…make sure you hadn't forgotten about us. But I guess I was wrong." I walked away, feeling incredibly depressed. I meant nothing to her. But when I was only five feet away, I turned around one last time.

"Even if you forget all about it, and become popular, and forget I even exist, I'll always be here. Because I promised you I would always be there if you needed my help." I tried to smile, even though my heart felt hurt because she could only stand there and hide behind Tanako and Suzuki. "We'll always be your friends Jeri. So try not to forget about us."

And then I walked back to Kazu and Kenta. They looked worried about me, and Kazu tried to ask me what I problem was, but I pretended like nothing had happened.

"Why did you do that?" Kazu asked in a hushed voice. "You knew she'd either blow you off or pretend like you don't exist."

I nodded sadly, and attempted a smile. "Yeah, I know." I did know. I had known she would do that. "But I wanted her to know that we're not the ones leaving her. I wanted her to know we'd still be there for her if something happened."

Kenta shrugged and sat down next to me, the wind tossing his hair into a mess. "I don't Takato. I think you're the only one who would still be there for her, after all is said and done."

I smiled. "I know." And I sat down on the road to look out over the cliff. Yeah, I didn't exist anymore to her. But I knew that somewhere inside her, she knew that I would always be there for her. And that alone was comfort for me, even though my heart ached like nothing else.

And then I heard someone scream. Thinking of Jeri, I jumped up and ran in the direction I'd heard it from. Everyone did. I found Jeri staring wide-eyed at the edge of the cliff, as Suzuki held her close to him. The sight sickened me, so I ignored them and looked warily over the edge of the cliff. There, on a ledge maybe ten feet below us, Tanako had fallen. She had dirt on her face, and was clinging to the side of the cliff for dear life, screaming.

"What happened?" our teacher screamed at the cheerleading squad. Leave it to a female teacher to add noise to the problem.

"She didn't realize how close she was to the edge, and bent down to tie her shoe. Someone bumped her, and she fell over!" One of the cheerleaders said, tears streaming down her face. "Please don't let her die!"

"Tanako, hold on, okay?" our teacher yelled down. "Don't panic, and don't move. Alright?"

Tanako screamed some more, about how they were asking the impossible, as our teacher called the police. The tow truck company with our spare tire was an hour away, and the police would be about the same time. I knew just by looking that there was no way Tanako could sit and wait for that long. And neither could the cliff ledge. It was already beginning to crumble at the extra weight.

"She has to climb up!" Suzuki declared. "Tanako! You have to climb up!"

"I can't!" she screamed.

The whole situation got louder as all the girls started screaming and crying, and all the guys tried to calm them down so that they wouldn't fall over either. The teachers were busy trying to keep everyone in order, and the drive was trying to find some rope.

I stared at the turmoil anxiously. Someone had to act, and yet no one here was qualified to do it. I clenched my jaw and wished fervently that guilmon was still with me, but it was a futile wish. Nothing would come of it.

And then suddenly, though the noise around me was louder than she could speak, I heard Jeri's voice. She was calling my name, fearfully. My heart soared, and quicker than Kazu could ask me a question, I was by her side.

"Takato," she practically whispered. And though Suzuki was holding her close, she still shook as if she felt unprotected.

"I'm here," the words slipped out before I could choose them, and I wondered if I should have said something else.

"No one else can save her Takato…" she said faintly. "But you go mountain climbing all the time. You can do it."

I stared at her in disbelief. Jeri was asking me to save Tanako. My inner self struggled, my fear and enmity fighting against my will to do what is right, and my will to do anything for Jeri.

"Please Takato….can you save her, like you saved me?"

I felt the burning hatred in Suzuki's eyes as he glared at me. And felt the burning pain in Jeri's as they asked me with unspoken words for forgiveness. After all she had done to ignore me, she was asking me to risk my life for someone I didn't even like.

But I nodded. I bit my lip and breathed deeply, preparing myself for what I knew would be a challenge, and placed my hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry," I whispered. "Just…think better of me Jeri. I'm not your enemy."

"I know." There were tears of shame on her cheeks and in her eyes.

I smiled reassuringly at her and hurried to the edge. Tanako was still screaming. I didn't want to go down to help her, especially since I usually had ropes to help me climb. And I wasn't _that _good at mountain climbing. But I still knew how to find some holds. "Kazu, Kenta!" I called. They were by my side before I could call them again.

"Oh no Takato, don't you even think about it!" Kenta's eyes grew so wide, they could have fallen out. "You are not climbing down there!"

The ledge under Tanako's feet began to crumble loudly, and she started screaming even louder. "If I don't, she could die!" I hissed. "Now keep people back so that rocks and dirt don't come sliding into our eyes. But when you see our hands, I want you to pull us up. Okay?"

Kazu clenched his hands into fists. "I'm going to get in trouble with the teacher for this but…."

Kenta sighed. "Why not."

I grinned at them. "Thanks." At least I could rely on them to help me. And then, disregarding my fear of heights, I swung myself down onto the rock face and started climbing down. I have climbed a few mountains in my short years, and every time I was dreadfully afraid. I hate heights. I hate them. But I climb because I want to over come my fear. Because I am stronger than that. I want my fears to also be my strengths. So that's why I climb.

They say climbing down is harder that climbing up. I agree. But climbing down was so fast, it took me a minute to realize I was already next to Tanako at the ledge. I called her name, startling her out of her screaming, and she turned to stare at me with red and puffy eyes.

"I'm here to help you climb back up," I said. "Now take it easy, and give me your hand."

"You?" she demanded in disbelief. "You're nothing! Get out of my face!"

I was beginning to get frustrated. "This rock is going to break under your feet!" I shouted at her. "Now you either shut up and do as I say, or you will fall to the bottom and DIE! Now GIVE ME YOUR HAND!"

It's amazing what fear of death can do sometimes. She quieted as much as a sobbing girl can, and gave me a shaky hand. With my right hand I guided hers to an easy hold in the rock, while holding myself up with my left. Then I showed her where to put her other hand. Then her right foot, then her left…and slowly she took the first step.

"That's it," I encouraged softly, giving her some more directions. "You're doing just fine." I avoided saying 'don't look down,' because that is always the WORST thing to say in this kind of situation. The noise above us had quieted some, and I knew that they were watching with held breaths to see if we'd make it. I also knew that I'd be in trouble for doing this. But the fact the Jeri was as close as Kazu would allow to see that I made it up okay was comforting to me, and gave me strength to continue patiently on.

Before I knew it, we were at the top. "We're almost there!" I breathed in relief. "One last step!"

Tanako suddenly became more shaky, and I knew that she was starting to panic again. She reached up with both hands, forsaking her hold, and tried to grasp the edge. But as any mountain climber knows, the edge of the cliff is never like it is in the movies. You can't just hang onto the edge. It's usually the most dangerous part because dirt crumbles and slides, and there isn't much for you to hold on to. Tanako had no knowledge of this, and as she gripped the dirt with her fingers and felt herself sliding away, she screaming as loud as she could.

It was like slow motion from there. She's small, and very agile. But she is also easy to pick up. Without thinking, I pushing her upward onto the edge where Kazu and Kenta grabbed her and pulled her up. They turned to pull me up as well, but by then it was too late. I reached for my hold, but my torso was too far away from the cliff face. I found myself falling backwards onto the ledge where Tanako had fallen.

There was a great deal more screaming, and I distinctly heard Jeri screaming my name, before the ledge gave one last crack and crumbled into pieces. I fell soundlessly into the void below me, too shocked to say anything. The only think I can remember is hitting branches on my way down, and trying to break my fall so that I wouldn't die when I reached the bottom.

And then, everything when completely black and I knew no more.

(------)


	3. Life And Death

They say that a fall of twenty feet can kill a man, in the worst case scenario. But what about a fall of two thousand feet? I should think that that man who fell that distance would have died long before he reached the ground, either of the shock and trauma of the fall, or the crashing through tree limbs on his way down.

In fact, it is impossible in this world for a man to fall that distance without dying. Impossible.

So how is it then that I, Takato Matsuda, at the age of 15, did not die when I fell over two thousand feet, crashed through more than a few trees, and landed in a creek?

The answer: I didn't know. I simply woke up. Except…it wasn't that simple.

My first sensation was that of immense cold rippling through my entire being, from my head to the tips of my fingers and my toes. It felt incredibly like the very blood inside me was turning to ice. After that came a white-hot pain like that of a burning fire. It felt like the ice in my veins was melting into blood again, and then boiling as sugar would boil. And anyone who has cooked with sugar should know that it has to be hotter than boiling oil in order to boil, and that sugar burns are the worst you can get. Well, one of the worst. The fiery pain was such that I couldn't ignore it, that steadily grew and grew until I couldn't stay unconscious any longer. Slowly and painfully, my eyes fluttered open.

The first thing I saw was the sun, blaring in my eyes. It stung, and I knew that I probably had a major concussion. "Great. I guess I'm not in heaven." I took a shallow breath for fear of hurting myself, and tried to assess the situation. And that was when I noticed the strangeness to the pain I was feeling.

Only my right side of my body was hurting. My left side felt cold, very cold, but perfectly fine. With lazy surprise, I lifted my left hand up to my face and looked at it, blocking the sun from my eyes. All I could see were a million blaring lights in my face, and closing my eyes again didn't help. The blinking lights still remained.

Yep. Major concussion all right. I groaned and dropped my hand, then yanked it back up again in surprise. I had dropped it into something cold and wet. Water! Curious, I turned my head to get a better look. With all the stars in my eyes, I couldn't see anything but a vague brilliance, as if I was looking into nothing but pure light. It hurt my eyes, and I figured that the water was reflecting the bright sun. Funny, I didn't remember bright sun when I fell. Before it had been slightly cloudy. But now, the sun was so bright that I couldn't stand it. Perhaps it was just the concussion. I decided to go with that theory, and stay laying there. I couldn't move because of the pain, and I couldn't see because of my concussion. But I knew I had to stay awake to stay alive.

It was only a few seconds after I came to that conclusion that my eyes closed and I lost consciousness. In fact, it was as I was falling asleep that I wished I could just die so that the pain would end, and I could go to heaven. But it was not to be that way. Destiny had another plan for me.

(------)

Voices. I was sure it was voices. They were indistinct, and too soft for me to hear very well, but I knew they were voices. I wondered if the quiet voices over my head were what had woken me, or if it was the boiling fire spreading through my veins on the right side of my body. Either way, I was slowly waking up. At least my head felt somewhat clearer. Or did it? Maybe not clearer, but at least it wasn't ringing.

I opened my eyes slowly, softly, but not very wide. I peered through the barely open eyelids and eyelashes to where the voices were coming from.

I was dreaming. This wasn't real. Quickly I pulled my eyelids closed and tried to wake up. But I was sure that I was already awake. The pain was too real, and so were the sounds and smells around me. The water rushing through my clothes and freezing my whole left side of my body was perfect for waking me up. So I wasn't dreaming. Hoping that what I had just seen would vanish when I opened my eyes, I peered through barely open eyes at the figures that were floating above me.

Two figures hovered above me, talking to each other. They were both girls, and both of them had wings. Wings? I must be dreaming! No. I wasn't. The reality of what I was feeling was enough to tell me I was awake. One of the two figures was hovering over the land, on my right side, and the other was on my left, over the creek. They were arguing.

I turned my attention to the one on the right, and studied her carefully. Her face was round and delicate, and she had large fiery eyes that held passion and defiance in them. Her hair was a golden red, and was shaggy and hanging loose about her head. It was short, and came only just past her long pointed ears. From her back sprung four wings, two larger ones on top, and two smaller ones on bottom, a large and small one to each side of her body. They were thin and delicate, and looked like fire to my eyes. There was gold mixed with the red and orange in her wings, and they looked so beautiful it was all I could not to stare at them. She was clothed in golden robes with crimson edging, and her feet were bare. Her skin was a light pink, and she had a gold tattoo of some symbol I didn't recognize on her shoulder, and another one on her left cheek. She was beautiful. But she was also angry.

Slowly, so as not to disturb her, I turned my eyes over to the left to look at the other figure. She, like the other creature, had two sets of wings. Only instead of gold and crimson, she looked like ice and water. Blues and whites mixed with silver were her colors, and it took me a long time to really define what she looked like.

Her face was thin and delicate, with a prominent chin and high cheekbones. Her skin was pale blue, almost pure white, and her eyes were a mix of clear, icy blue like that of a freezing winter day with no clouds, and pure silver. In them was not passion like the fiery one, but a peaceful steadiness of one who listens before speaking, and says little when she actually does speak. In her eyes was wisdom, but they were also cold. I couldn't tell whether she was kind or cruel, but I could tell that she was wise.

Her hair, unlike her companion's, was flowing and long, almost as long as she was tall. It was bluish colored, with white streaks in it, and was very straight and smooth. It floated on the air around her as if gravity did not exist. Her ears were long and thin, and pointed like her companion's, and she wore silver earrings that looked like droplets of water. For her clothes she wore a simple robe of ice blue and silver that did not cover her shoulders. It hung from her figure gracefully, and a slit in the skirt revealed one leg from her mid thigh down. She also was bare-footed, and bore strange silver markings on her shoulder and under her left eye.

But it was her wings that caught my attention the most. They were long, longer than the fiery creature's wings, and looked like they were made of glass. Sliver and blue shards formed together to create a crystal-like appearance, and when the sun shone through them it left little rainbows on the air around her. They looked so fragile that I thought if I simply touched them, they might shatter. So I lay very still and tried to listen to what these two creatures were saying.

"No," the fiery one said firmly, her small voice echoing on the wind as if it were not entirely there at all. "He cannot be yours. He has landed on my side, and so he must remain with me."

"And yet he has fallen into the stream," the icy one replied, her voice calm and even, like her eyes. "And anyone who falls into the stream must come with me."

"Only half of him is in the stream. The other half belongs to me!" The floating female landed next to me and placed her hands on her hips. "And so I will take him."

"You cannot take half of him! That is ridiculous!" The icy one landed as well, only she landed in the stream. I could feel the water growing colder while she was in it, if that was at all possible. And I shivered.

"He's cold. I'll take him and warm him up. You'll only make him sick."

"My stream healed him. And what have you done?"

I wondered what was going on, until suddenly it hit me, just as hard as when I had fallen all that way. They were arguing over what they were going to do with me! In my surprise, I opened my eyes and lifted my head, and both of them turned to stare at me with surprise. For a long time we stared at each other, until finally, the blue one let out the breath she had been holding.

"Child you have fallen far, and should be dead. And so you would be if you had not landed into our realm." The icy creature bowed her head slightly, and a faint smile lit her lips. "But I fear you will not survive much longer."

I stared at her silently, blinking, not sure what to say. Finally, the fiery one spoke instead. "If we do not decide what to do with you, you will die."

I thought about that for a minute, and then remembered my field trip. "Can't you take me up to where the bus is?" I asked. My voice was dry, and I sounded awful. "They could get help…"

The icy one shook her head sadly. "I'm sorry dear child. But to them, you are already dead. And have been for a very long time."

"What do you mean?" I was growing anxious. "How long?"

"In our time, it has only been three days. But from the mountain from which you fell, it has been three months."

I stared at her in horror, my mouth hanging open. This couldn't be real! What kind of dream was I having? When would I wake up in my bed? "But…" I lifted my left hand wearily, trying to get up, but dropped it into the freezing cold water again. I couldn't do anything. "But what…how am I still alive?"

"My stream has kept you alive."

"And so has my garden." The fiery one frowned at her companion, slightly annoyed.

"Be that as it may, you have been kept alive here for only a certain amount of time, until we can decide what to do with you."

"How are you going to do that?" I asked anxiously.

"Since you're awake, you are the one to make the choice." The golden and crimson creature sat down next to me, staring into my face with a serious expression. Her eyes were so large, and alive…they held mind entranced. "Either you can die, or you can live. That is your choice."

If you were faced with the choice of living or dying, what would you choose? Would you choose to live? Would you be afraid of death? Or would you choose to die, because to the world you were dead already? Faced with the choice of my own life or death, I didn't know what to say. For one, I knew that I was already dead. Where would I live? What would I do? What if I never saw anyone ever again? Then what? But if I died, then I would never have a chance to do anything else ever again. I would have missed my chance for life. I would never get to see Jeri again. Or Kazu and Kenta. Or my parents. Or anyone else. And I couldn't die with that on my mind.

"Where there is life, there is hope," I said, swallowing the dry lump in my throat. "I want to live. I want to see my friends and my family again."

She looked so sad when she smiled down at me with her large, bright, passionate eyes. And I wondered why. "Then," she sighed. "We must decide who shall take you. The Fire, or the Ice."

I looked at both of them, and felt myself suddenly beginning to fade away to blackness. I knew that death was upon me, because I could feel my body dying even as I opened my mouth to speak. "Fire and Ice?" I asked, confused. But that was all I could say before everything vanished into darkness and death.

At that moment, my body died.

(------)


	4. Lost In A Dream

How do you know when you're dreaming and when you're awake?

How can you really know which is which?

Does pinching really work?

There were days when I would wake up,

Go to school,

Come home,

Do homework,

Spend time with my friends…

And then wake up again to realize I was dreaming and I'm late for school.

That right there is one of the greatest cruelties ever invented.

Who invented those kinds of dreams anyway?

Those dreams seem so real.

But then, all dreams always seem so real.

Until you wake up of course.

But what happens when you wake up, and find that you don't know whether you're dreaming or sleeping? What then do you do?

My eyes flickered open, and the only thing I could see through my half-open eyelids was light. It was so bright that I could hardly see. But when I opened my eyes further, the light diminished, fading into the background with the ceiling. My mind did a reality check, and I wondered if I was finally waking up in bed. Had the whole day been a dream? One of those that seem like real days? Was I late to school?

I flipped over onto my side to glance at my alarm clock, and blinked in surprise when I couldn't find it. All I could see was the edge of the bed. But…it wasn't MY bed!

I must confess I was freaked out. I was waking up in a bright room on a bed that wasn't my own. In a room that wasn't my own. And here…here I thought I was…

"Dead…" I whispered, the word hanging heavy in the air. It was the only sound, and it was so loud it made my ears hurt. All I could hear was my heart beating. "But…" I stood up and looked around.

The bed was huge. And white. And flat. Like a futon, only mounted on a bed frame of silver. There were windows surrounding my room on every wall but one, and all of them were open. The silken curtains were airy and light, and floated on the gust of wind as if they were as light as spider webbing, or something lighter. They were crimson. The floor was marble, and so were the walls. White marble with silver and crimson. And besides the bed there was no other furniture. Only windows leading out to a balcony, and a door on the wall with no windows. The room was shaped not with four walls, but with six.

And I felt completely alone.

The first question that came to my mind was "What the heck is going on here?"

The second was "Did my dream really happen? And am I….in heaven?"

Both I asked out loud, one after the other. And I waited for an answer, hoping for someone to come and explain all this weirdness, but instead the only thing I could hear were my own words echoing off the marble walls.

I shivered. "Okay this is giving me the creeps. I think I'm going to take a look around." I turned toward the door, and reached out to take the handle in my hand. And then another question entered my head. Was I dressed? I quickly glanced at myself, and breathed a sigh in relief. Yes, I was. Except…

"What the heck am I wearing?" I demanded, glancing at myself in surprise. Deep red pants that were soft and billowy were on my legs. I felt like I could run, jump, do anything in them! My legs felt so free and comfortable and warm that I forgot that these pants weren't something I'd normally have as my wardrobe. My upper body was covered in a sleeveless shirt that fit just as comfortably as my pants. It was white, with red lining. There were comfortable but sturdy boots on my feet, which were white and red with silver soles, and something like a white cloth wrapped with silver and red cord around my upper arms as some kind of style or decoration. All in all, the look was like that out of a fantasy or Medieval time movie.

"Okay weird," I decided, but it was better than nothing. And frankly, I felt comfortable wearing it. "Now for a little exploring…" I opened the door and stepped out into a large hallway. There were thousands of doors on either side, and I stood breathlessly on the marble floor, staring. Which one should I open first? I started walking down the hall, looking side to side. The marble was just like that in the room I had woken up in, except that it varied in color and shade every once in a while. It was mostly gray and white, but occasionally a color would ripple through it. I got the feeling as I walked that I was in a huge mansion, a house so big I probably couldn't count all the rooms! And then I came to the stairs.

Stairs that led up, and stairs that led down. I decided to take the ones that led down. Looking out the window had told me I was not at ground level, and probably I would find what I was looking for down there. I wasn't sure what I was looking for. I was just looking for something. Perhaps an answer to my question.

I was impressed with the size of everything around me. Chandeliers on the ceiling, rugs on the marble floor, windows, doors….everything was immense, with intricate and delicate designs. All of them were beautiful, and there was nothing that I didn't like. Even though the house was completely empty, I did not feel afraid. It wasn't a haunted house or anything. It wasn't creepy, it was beautiful. And it smelled like fresh air. And maybe it was just me, but there was something welcoming about it. It was almost like I was meant to be there. It was like waking up in my own house.

It felt like home.

That was what scared me. I found myself hurrying down the stairs, running at a speed I never though was possible. I leapt the last few stairs and landed on the ground level, glancing around me. It seemed no different here than it did anywhere else in the house. I was in yet another hall way, with doors on every side.

I glared at the emptiness in frustration. "Where is everybody?" I shouted, my voice echoing and rebounding off the marble walls. I waited for an answer for what seemed like forever, and finally, someone did.

"Who's shouting?" someone asked.

"Me!" I answered curtly. I felt bad for snapping, but I was a little annoyed at being left in the dark. "Where are you?"

"Here," the person answered, stepping around the corner of the hallway and walking towards me. She was familiar to me, and I recognized her as one of the fairy-like creatures that were in my dream…the ones who were arguing over me…

"You!" I gasped, staring at her. She was the fiery one, with the short, messy hair.

She smiled at me. "I have a name," she said gently. "I wouldn't mind if you used it." She curtsied to me. "I am Samas, one of the many who live in this house. And what is your name?"

I bowed, thinking it probably polite. "I am honored to meet you Samasu," I said, pronouncing her name wrong with my Japanese accent. I noticed the spark of amusement and annoyance in her eyes as I said it. "I am…" I grasped for the word that I knew was my name, and couldn't find it. I stared at her in shock. "I…don't remember!" I blurted. "Why can't I remember my name?"

She sighed. "Because you died. Many things were lost to you."

"What do you mean I DIED! If I died then I wouldn't be here now would I?" I demanded, glaring at her. "Please, tell me what's going on here!"

Samas sighed and nodded. "Of course you have many questions," she said, taking my hand and leading me down the hall. "But I alone cannot answer them. We must find Venera. She and I both must answer your questions."

"Venera?"

"She is the other fairy you met last month."

"LAST MONTH?" I stopped still. "Last MONTH?"

"Yes," she answered, wondering at my surprise. "Of course. After a change like that it takes much to recover. And even now you haven't recovered everything."

I stepped backwards away from her, a sinking feeling filling my gut. "What do you mean? How have I changed? Tell me what's going on here!"

The second girl—Venera—walked up, wearing the same serious expression on her face that I remembered seeing before. "You died, as a human," she said simply, her eyes boring into mine with an unblinking stare. "And if not for falling into our realm, you would have stayed dead."

"You're not making sense," I pleaded. "Speak in words I can understand!"

Samas' expression was that of pity. "We managed to save you by turning you into one of us," she said. "And we did it just in time. You are alive…but you are no longer human, nor of that world. This is your home now."

I stepped away from them, shaking my head. "No, you're joking. This is just a dream, isn't it? I'm going to wake up in my bed, and none of this happened." I blurted the words angrily, longing for them to be true, but I was denying what I already knew.

They were telling the truth.

"Takato," Venera said solemnly, revealing the name that I had forgotton, "you are a fairy."

I stared at the two of them in horror, and ran away. I didn't care where I was going, I just wanted out of this house.

They were lying. This was a dream. Somebody help me!

I ran out the door and found myself in a whole different world. It was unlike anything I had ever seen before. Gardens and streams surrounded me, and the walls of Mt. Fuji surrounded the hidden valley and protected it from outside eyes. It was beautiful, but I didn't care. I wanted to go home.

I ran toward the wall where I knew I had fallen from, and without even thinking, threw myself upon it and started climbing. It was like I had wings I sped up the wall so fast. Climbing, climbing….the cliff went on forever.

I glanced through the trees that I had fallen through, surprised that I had survived the damage. There was no possible way I could have survived unless…

"No!" I cried, unaware of the tears that streamed down my cheeks. "It's not true! I wont believe it!" My hands and feet brought me quickly out of the trees, and back to the cliff that I had fallen down. And then, throwing myself up, I reached the top.

The road stretched before me, to the right and to the left, and I could see no one on it. It was deserted.

My eyes dripped tears like over-flowing rain clouds, and I stared helplessly at nothing. I wanted someone to come, someone to see me and tell me I was going to be okay. But all I got was the wind on my face.

"It's not fair!" I cried, slipping to my knees. "Why did this happen? Why does it have to be true? Why can't it just be a dream?"

"Because you made a choice."

I gasped, startled, and looked up. They were both there, Samas and Venera. Samas looked pitying. Venera looked serious. "If I had known, then…"

Venera interrupted me. "If you had known than you would have made the same choice," she stated, somewhat harshly. "You chose to live, and the magic of our kind saved you. You can either stand up like a man and take it, or go run back to your room and cry. Either way, you're stuck with it." She frowned at me, but there was kindness in her eyes. I turned away from her, feeling sorry for myself.

Samas walked towards me, and placed a warm hand on my shoulder. "Life is hope," she said softly. "And you have been given a second chance. Why not take this change in victory instead of defeat? Change is a part of life. You need to learn to deal with it sooner or later."

I sighed, staring at the road in self pity. But their words reached my heart. "You're right," I mumbled angrily. It wasn't them that angered me. It was myself. "I should know all about it. I should know how to accept difficulty and keep fighting. I've done it a millions times before. So why am I acting like a wimp now?"

Samas smiled at me sneakily. "Could it be," she asked, "that you are in love?"

I stared at her silently, and let her words sink in. Another tear slipped down my cheek. "Maybe…" I admitted. "Why?"

Venera's mouth turned up in the closest thing I'd seen as a smile on her face. "It makes it harder for you to accept that you're no longer part of that world, that's all," she teased. "But there are ways to get around that."

"Ways?" My curiosity was now stirred.

She smirked. "But you're going to have to figure that one out yourself."

I stared at my hand, thoughtful, and then looked up again. The two of them were gone. But their words were still in my mind. "I am acting like a wimp," I sighed. "I just don't want this to be real. I just want everything to go back to normal. But I guess it can't. Nothing can ever be the same again." I stared at the road, and blinked in surprise.

A car was driving my way.

But the thing that excited and scared me the most was that I recognized the car. I had seen it somewhere before! I should have known it like my own name! Except….I wasn't even sure of that any more. Venera had mentioned it, but already I had forgotton. All I could think about was the car.

It was headed straight for me.

I stood in the middle of the road, waiting. I needed to talk to whoever it was driving the car. Perhaps then, I could find out what it is I lost in my fall, and who it is that I am now. Until I can answer those questions…

I am lost.

(------)


	5. Change Hurts

Whenever change happens, there is also pain.

Everyone knows, because everyone experiences pain.

And everyone recognizes the pain because change hurts. It means things will never be the same. The things you used to take for granted wont be there for you anymore.

Change is painful.

But it is also good. It is also beautiful, meaningful, and worthwhile.

Without change, one cannot mature. Without change, one cannot fully appreciate the beautiful things of life. Change helps us to realize where we are lacking, and where we need to grow.

And not many people know that. It took me a long time to learn.

At this time, all I knew was that change hurt. And I hated it.

I stared silently at the car coming toward me, knowing I should recognize it. It was so familiar. Whose car was it? I stood there blankly, watching it come, and then suddenly realized something

I was dead. They couldn't see me!

I sprang into the air and hid myself further up in the rocks, watching the car pull to a stop below me. For a second I wondered how on earth I had gotten up here, but was too interested in who was in the car to think much more about it. I silently gripped the rocks, hiding in a shadow, and watched as two figures stepped out of the car.

One was a girl, the other was a man. The girl hurried into the middle of the road, looking fervently around her as if trying to find someone. I knew she was looking for me.

"Honey, what are you looking for?" the man asked, a sad and solemn expression on his face.

"It was him, I know it was!" the girl sobbed, clutching a small bouquet of flowers to her bosom. "I saw him here! Didn't you see him father? When we were driving?"

The man shook his head. "You're seeing things Jeri. No one is here. Just us." He sighed sadly, reaching out a hand toward her, but she pulled away, sobbing.

"No," she pleaded. "He was here! I saw him!"

"Jeri, he's dead."

I felt a wound open in my heart as I watched her cry, and I wanted to go to her and comfort her. Jeri. Her name… it was so familiar to me. It was dear to me. Could she be the one that I…the one that I loved?

Jeri dropped her head, tears streaming down her face. "I know," she sobbed. "And it's all my fault. If I hadn't asked him to go down there…"

"Then Tanako would have died. Takato is a hero, honey. You should be proud of him."

I watched helplessly, unable to make myself go to her. My memory began to return to me, and I knew that she was talking about me. I remembered. I knew what happened. But… I'm alive Jeri! I am alive! You did see me! I'm here! Except…

Jeri walked to the edge of the cliff, the spot where I had fallen. She stared down into the depths, sobbing, and tossed the flowers down. I watched them fall, an ache in my heart. "I'm sorry Takato," she wept. "You were always there for me, even when I pushed you away. And as soon as I realized my mistake, you were taken from me. And all of its my fault. If I hadn't bumped Tanako, she wouldn't have fallen. And you wouldn't have died. It's all my fault."

Jeri's father pulled her away from the edge, back toward the car. He seemed afraid that she might throw herself down, and I was afraid too. I didn't want that for her. I wanted to see her smile again! Oh Jeri… would that I never caused you so much pain!

Her father got in the car, telling her that she needed to get in as well. But she lingered, staring off at the edge of the cliff. I swallowed a lump in my throat, and crept down from my position on the rocks, landing gently on my feet without a sound. I wanted to walk up to her, tell her I was fine and that she needed to move on, and not linger on the painful memory of the past. But I never got the chance. She opened the car door and stepped in, leaving me standing in the middle of the road helplessly.

"I love you Jeri," I called softly, and she paused for just a moment. "I still will be here for you. Always." She was in the car now, buckled up and ready to go. And just before the car pulled away, she turned, and her eyes met mine. "Do not worry about me," I whispered, knowing she could hear me. I smiled at her, and she began to cry. I watched as her father drove away. She was pleading for him to stop, but when he looked my way, he could not see me. His eyes went through me as if I weren't there. Only Jeri could see me.

I watched silently until the car had driven out of my sight, and then sighed a heavy sigh. I loved her. I _love _her. Jeri, the only girl I ever really liked. She missed me. And still, I had to say good bye. She needed to know that I was alright, but I knew I couldn't hang out with her the way I used to. I had to say good bye to that life. I am not a human anymore.

That hurt. "I hate change," I cried out, angry. "Nothing good ever comes of it! Nothing." I stared helplessly at the road, and decided that it was time I went home. I turned back toward the cliff, and then stopped. No, wait…I had to see if my parents were okay. It must be torture for them, to lose their only child, just as it was torture for me to lose them.

I had to go back, just to see them. I had to tell them I was alright. I had to make sure they would be okay. I had to see them one last time! And Henry, and Rika, Kazu and Kenta…I had to see them too!

Without another thought, I was racing as fast as I could toward my old home. I was running so fast I felt like I was flying, running on the wind. I felt freer than I had ever felt in my entire life… freer than the time I biomerged with Guilmon. It was like I had wings.

It was then that I looked down, and realized I was flying.

(------)


	6. Life is Hope

Everyone wishes they could fly. No one can deny it. Even I, so afraid of heights as I was all my life, had held a secret desire to be able to fly. Flying seemed like such freedom, like such control. It is something humans cannot do. We were not created to fly, we were created to run.

But that didn't stop man from trying anyway. It was this desire to fly that allowed such great inventions to be made, inventions like the airplane. Out from the desire to do the things we weren't made to do, we have made great things. We are creatures created to create. And the desire for greatness runs through our veins. It is a part of being human.

I never fully appreciated how spectacular of a creature we humans are. It was not until I was faced with the fact that I wasn't human anymore did I suddenly realize, suddenly discover—I was lucky to have been born a human. And now that I don't have that, I feel incomplete.

I am a fairy now. The thought was a hard one for me to accept. I didn't want to think that being a fairy was different than being a human, but it is. A fairy is a whole different race entirely. I couldn't have understood how much I'd be missing before this had happened. I couldn't have been able to realize just how much I took for granted. But now I was slowly able to see it.

As a fairy, I have no concept of time. Days or years could pass, and I wouldn't know. I have to really focus on the passage of time to be able to realize what the date is, or what the time is, or even how old I am becoming. Where as when I was a human, I always knew time. I lived in time. It was a part of me. Now, I am separate from it. It happens at the same time I do, but we don't work together anymore. I didn't know how I knew this, but it was suddenly there, in my mind. It was just something that I knew.

So there I was, flying through the air as if I had known how to do it all my life. I headed toward the place that used to be my home without even having to think of where to go. My heart knew where it was, and so I followed my heart. It was strange, but before I had time to ponder it, I was hovering in front of the window that led to my room—or rather, the room that used to be mine.

Everything had been boxed up. The room had been changed into an office, but some of my stuff was still there. There were pictures of me on the walls, and candles beneath them. And on a desk, there were letters people had written my parents concerning my death. The scene touched me, and I felt tears suddenly stream down my cheeks. My parents…I missed them so much…

I landed on the ground, and looked into the window of the bakery. My mother was inside, still at the counter selling the bread my father bakes so beautifully. She seemed happy, something I was relieved to see. At least…happy on the outside.

"I want you to be happy!" I whispered, my heart aching. "I miss you, but I don't want you to worry about me. I don't want you to suffer because of what happened." A part of me knew that I could not tell her what had happened to me, because it would be too hard for her to understand. For her, she would be seeing a ghost, and it would stir up grief she didn't need to see. I know that I am very much alive, and that I am a fairy, but it would not be that way for her. It would be painful.

And yet… Yet the other side of me wanted to tell her anyway. I was alive, wasn't I? Sure, I'm not a human…but couldn't I try to live as I once did? No one would have to know…

"I can see what you're thinking, but it's not going to work. You know that."

I turned to the voice, startled, and found myself staring at Venera. Samas was right behind her. "What do you want," I asked crossly.

"To tell you a few things." Venera sighed, looking at me pitifully. "First of all, that you can't go back. You'll just have to live with it. Second, you're a fairy, so you have to be careful. You can't just show up and expect people to accept you. People wont always be able to see you. Very few can. Only people who believe in fairies will be able to see you at all, and sometimes even those people are dangerous."

"What do you mean, dangerous?" I asked. I was starting to get worried. Maybe this fairy thing would be even harder than I wanted to deal with.

"There are people who know fairies exist," Samas said, choosing her words carefully, "who cannot be trusted. They capture fairies, kidnapping them, and then use them against other people."

"But how can they do that? That doesn't make sense."

"Sure it does," Samas said seriously. "Fairies have magic. And if a human captures a fairy, the fairy is bound to them. Where do you think people got the stories of genies? Or making wishes on fairies? Most myths start from legends, and legends from facts. If a human catches you, you will have to grant their wishes. Of course, how much you can grant them is determined by what kind of fairy you are."

"And what kind of fairy am I?"

Both fairies fidgeted nervously. Samas decided to speak up. "That's the hard part," she admitted. "See, you aren't just one type of fairy. We should first explain the different types of fairies, and what kind of magic they have, and what kinds of wishes they can grant."

"We should first get out of sight."

I looked around. People passed by us without seeing us, but the fear of being captured by an ill-minded human scared me. "Yeah," I agreed. I led them to the window the led to my room, and went inside. It was only after I went in that I realized I had simply gone through the wall without even thinking. That was scary. But both Venera and Samas were able to do the same.

"This will do for now," Venera sighed, looking around. She deliberately ignored the shrine set up in my honor, but it was clear that Samas was touched by it. "There are many different types of fairies. There are elemental fairies, whose magic is like that of their element. There are genies, whose magic is almost unlimited, but are locked inside an object until they have a master. There are seasonal fairies, whose magic has to do with what season they are associated with, and there are the individual fairies. Individual fairies each have a different function. For example, the Dream Fairy is the fairy who gives people good dreams. He wards away nightmares when he can. There are billions of people, so he can't ward them all away, but every good dream comes from him if he can grant it. Another example is the Mischief Fairy. Sometimes mistaken by those who haven't met him to be a girl fairy, he causes all sorts of mischief for everyone."

"There are millions of different kinds of fairies," Samas stressed. "You couldn't possibly name them all. It's crazy. But we will tell you about what kind of fairy you possibly are."

"Possibly?" I asked, suspicious. "Why do you say that?"

"First of all, you are an elemental fairy." Samas ignored my question. Most likely, she would answer it within the next few minutes. "Normally, you only have one element. But in your case, you kind of have two."

"Two?" I glanced at myself, and then looked up at them. Realization suddenly dawned on me. "I see. So that's why both of you have to be here to explain all this to me. Your element is ice, and yours is fire, and somehow I ended up with both."

"It was a once in a trillion mistake, but we're glad the process didn't kill you…" Samas said guiltily. "Basically, you might have the powers of both ice and fire fairies, or you might just look cool and have no magic at all. We don't know. That will be up to you to find out."

"But you should know, that you could also be the odd fairy out who has more magic than you are able to know how to use," Venera warned. "This happens occasionally, and when it does, evil fairies from all over sense your presence and search for you to kill you. And if that is the case, if someone captures you, you could possibly grant them unlimited wishes."

I gulped. "But what if it isn't? What if I have no magic at all?"

"There is a way of finding out." Venera stretched her hand out, palm up, and closed her eyes. A sparkling, glowing sphere that looked like frost appeared in her hand. Then she opened her eyes. "This sphere is something every elemental fairy can make. Of course, mine is out of ice." She look at me. "If you have no magic, you will not be able to make one. If you have only a little magic, your sphere will shatter very quickly. The more magic you contain, the longer the sphere will stay intact. If your sphere stays intact forever then…" she dropped it, and it shattered and vanished into nothing. "…Then you have unlimited magic."

I nodded, gulping slightly. I was supposed to be able to do this then? I decided it was worth a try, and stretched out my hand and closed my eyes. For a minute I expected something to happen, and then realized I had to make it happen. It took thought and effort. Of course.

_Okay, _I thought, concentrating. _I want to make my sphere, and I want to see how long it lasts. I just don't know how to do it. _I concentrated, imagining magic rippling down my arm and growing into a ball in my hand, but when I opened my eyes, nothing was there.

The two fairies were smiling at me. "Of course," Samas said jokingly, "You'll have to learn to use your magic first."

They both smirked at my annoyance, and then walked out side. "We must return home. You should come to. If you want to stay here longer, you can. After all, no fairy has control over the other. You can do anything you like. But know this: The longer you stay out here, the more danger you put yourself in."

With that, both of them flew away. They left my standing in the room that used to be my own, alone. I sighed, and then glanced at my hand. It was stretched out, palm up, waiting for the sphere to appear there. And yet nothing happened.

"How do I know if I have magic at all?" I asked out loud, knowing I would get no answer. I glared at my hand. "Come on you stupid sphere. Do what I want you to do." I stared at my hand, straining with every muscle to make the sphere appear. But it wouldn't.

I gave up and flew out of the room, landing on the pavement in front of the bakery. Inside I could see my parents, working quietly. My father was at the ovens, my mother cleaning the small round tables that were situated in the bakery. My heart was made up. I had to tell them I was okay.

I pushed the door open, hearing the bell chime as I came in. My mother looked up, watching me come to counter with a blank expression on my face. She looked at me kindly, but it was clear she did not recognize me. And suddenly, something that Venera and Samas had said returned to me. Only the people who believed in fairies could see me. Did that mean…

"Can I get you something?" My mother asked. She walked behind the counter and waited for me to make a decision.

Shyly, I glanced at myself. I was dressed the same as what I had found myself wearing when I woke up. My wings were sticking out my back elegantly, like pieces of artwork. The two wings on my right side were icy-looking, while the two on my right looked like flames that had frosted into wings. I must look very strange to her. I turned and smiled guiltily at her, wondering why I had done something like this.

"May I have some melon pan?" I asked gently. I reached out my hand and dropped 100 yen on the counter I remembered that melon pan cost 96 yen, from when I used to live here. It then suddenly dawned on me that I had no idea where the money came from. Startled, I stared at my hand. I had simply conjured it up out of nothing. I knew what I wanted, and simply produced it because it never occurred to me that I was lacking it. So that was how my magic worked? I suddenly felt guilty. What if, like the sphere, the money would shatter into nothing? Something told me that it wouldn't, so I tried to trust that.

"Of course," my mother said, reaching down into the warm display case and taking out some fresh melon pan. She wrapped it up in tissue and placed it in a brown paper bag. Then she handed it to me. "And you are?"

My voice caught as I opened my mouth, and I didn't know what to say. Finally, I decided I simply had to tell the truth. "Takato," I said weakly, bowing and thanking her for the bread. "Your bread is delicious."

My mother stared at me blankly. To her this was all a dream. "Oh," she said eventually, her own voice sounding weaker than my own had sounded. "I see." After that she said nothing.

I turned and walked toward the door, and paused before I went out to turn back to her. I smiled sweetly, giving her the sweet smile she used to tell me was her favorite. "Thank you," I said. "Do well. Live in peace. And know that everything is alright." I turned and walked out. I knew that even though that had happened, my mom was not able to accept it. When I went outside, I took off into the air and flew off into the trees where I would not be seen. It would take my mom a long time to figure out what had just happened, and I hoped I hadn't done the wrong thing.

No, my mother would have wanted to know that I was alright. A part of me was delighted that she could see me. The other part was sad. She didn't recognize me. But maybe…maybe if she accepted me as a fairy…maybe she wouldn't have to lose me. Maybe I could still be there for her, even if things couldn't be the same.

I fished out my warm bread and took a bite, enjoying the sweet taste of the spongy bread. It was one of my favorites, and my mother's recipe is the best in all of Japan. For once that entire day, I felt a sudden peace about myself.

Yes, things were different. Yes, things would never be the same. I wasn't alive to the world anymore. BUT.

But if my friends could see me, if my mother could see me, if Jeri could see me…Then maybe there was hope. My life could still continue as a fairy. It wouldn't be the same, but it would still be my life. "Life is hope," I said softly. "And I am still alive. If my friends can accept me for what happened, then things wont be so bad. And if they can't, or if they can't see me, I can still be around for them. I can still be there."

My heart felt lighter. Yes, there was hope. Maybe things weren't so bad after all. I held out my hand, palm upward, and simply without trying produced what I had been looking for. A red, frosted sphere appeared in my hand. It was thick, almost completely solid. Venera's had been hollow, but mine was heavy, like that of a bowling ball. The outside was frozen, like ice, but the very center swirled with fire that was alive and thriving. It was a beautiful peace of art, and I admired it for a long time. So, this was my sphere, the sphere that indicated my magic.

It was so…thick!

Slightly worried, I let it fall to the concrete ground below me. The sphere landed, bounced about an inch, and rolled down the street. I gasped, frightened, and felt suddenly terrified when it stopped rolling. It had landed right into someone's feet.

Barely able to lift my eyes from the sphere up to the person it had landed in front of, I gulped. I had to look. Slowly, my eyes went up the legs, torso, chest…until I saw her face. She stared at the sphere that had rolled onto her shoes, and picked it up, examining it. Then she looked in the direction it had come from. Seeing no one, she frowned. All I could do was stare at her. She seemed so…so…

Familiar.

I sat there in the tree, searching my memory for a clue to who she was. She had reddish brown hair that was tied behind her in a high-ponytail. Her bangs hung loosely over her forehead. She looked like a tomboy, with her biking gloves that were worn just for show, and the studded belt that held up her jeans. Her shirt was black, and it read "Punks Not Dead." That shirt seemed familiar to me somehow.

And then suddenly, a name came to match the face. "I know her," I whispered to myself. "She's Rika!" I was excited, but too afraid to tell her I was here, in the tree. Rika looked around a little bit more, and then walked off in the direction of her house, taking my sphere with her.

I followed her. I had to know…I had to watch to make sure…I wanted to see how long it took for my sphere to shatter…if it shattered at all.

(------)

Encouragement will help me go faster. Thanks for the reviews, everyone. You are my biggest heroes.

-Rika195


	7. Rika

(------)

I watched as Rika walked into her house, holding my magical sphere in her hands. Her thin eyebrows were knit together in a slight frown, as her violet eyes contemplated the object in her hands. When she was alone in her room, she turned it over in her hands so that she could examine it. It was perfectly seamless, the flames inside it wreathing delicately with every touch of her hands. Finally, she looked out her window with a sigh.

I had followed her, and I was just outside her window, watching from a tree.

My heart was racing. I was scared, and thrilled at the same time. Rika had been one of my best friends, and I wanted so badly to tell her that I was alright. She would understand, wouldn't she? If I told her about myself?

Rika straightened, the hairs on her neck standing on end. She whirled around to look out the window into the tree where I was hidden. I held my breath, afraid that she would see me, and suddenly remembered that Rika always knew when she was being watched. She could tell even now. Did that mean…did Rika believe in fairies too?

Finally satisfied that no one was watching her, Rika turned her attention back to my sphere. I breathed a sigh in relief. I was feeling mixed emotions. Part of me wanted her to see me, and the other part was afraid of what she would say if she did. If Rika had seen me, I wouldn't know what to tell her. But then again, if she had seen me, then I could be able to still be friends with her. That thought made me feel excited, and I wondered to myself how many others would believe me if I came up to them.

Henry, Ryo, Kazu, Kenta…all of them my friends who I missed. Would they believe in fairies? Would they be able to see me too?

"What is this?" Rika asked out loud, sounding incredibly annoyed. I turned my attention back to her. She was holding the sphere with both hands now. When she could still not come up with any answer to what it might be, she got up and walked out to the porch. I could see her even more clearly now.

I was tempted to talk to her…to scare her…just for fun.

And I could get away with it, couldn't I?

I dashed into her house before I could change my mind.

I was not aware of it then, but somehow I knew it. Fairies do not live by the same laws that humans must live. They have their own set of rules, and whether I knew them or not, I followed them. I knew, as I hid in between walls, that as a fairy I had the freedom to do almost anything. But having grown up as a human, my conscience would not allow me to do things that were wrong for humans. So I didn't intend to do anything bad. I simple wanted to scare her.

Rika is tough. Unlike any other girl I know, she refuses to let other people know when she's afraid. And to top it all off, no one was ever able to catch her off guard, or scare her. We could startle her at times, but she was never scared of any prank we could come up with that wasn't bad or wrong.

I wanted to be the first to make her get scared.

I guess I still have a lot of growing up to do.

Rika was sitting on the deck, my sphere in her hands. The sun was shining through the trees down on her just right, and she looked completely relaxed. Her violet eyes were half closed, as if she felt too content to really think about anything.

It was too perfect.

I snuck forward, intending to touch her shoulder from behind…

"If you touch me, you'll end up knocked out on the floor," Rika hissed suddenly, her voice dark and foreboding.

I froze, my hand stretched halfway out to her shoulder. Then I dropped it in defeat. I had no idea how she knew I was there, but she did nonetheless. I had never been able to startle her before, and it looked like I'd never be able to do it now, either.

And so I stood there like an idiot.

Rika turned around, her sharp eyes still half closed, but now there was a demanding, suspicious, and dangerous look in her eyes. She held out the sphere in one hand. "You dropped this?" she asked, glaring at me.

I nodded. For some reason, I couldn't bring myself to do anything else. I felt so helpless under her gaze, as if I couldn't do anything. Rika was always like that. She was able to make anyone feel insignificant under her gaze. I was always wondering how she did it, too. I could never be as dangerous-looking as her.

"Who are you?" she demanded. Now she stood up, placing on hand on her hips and narrowing her eyes further. She looked me up and down as if I were a clown. "Or as I should probably say, what are you?" She huffed at me, as if I were disgracing her just by being there, and waited for me to answer.

And somehow, I couldn't think of anything to say.

So instead I looked at her up and down, noticing how she hadn't changed much at all. Inside I laughed wryly. Perhaps I was the only one who had changed. And then...

Then I suddenly noticed how much Rika had grown. And I wished I hadn't.

I usually never notice any girl besides Jeri, and I was wondering why now, all of a sudden, I was noticing Rika. Not that she wasn't gorgeous, because she is one of the prettiest girls I ever met, it just felt odd to suddenly notice how good-looking she was. I mean, of course I already knew that, but I never thought much about it. In my mind, no girl was prettier than Jeri. At least, that's how it used to be. Right then I wasn't sure.

I cleared my throat.

"I'm a fairy," I said. And of course, it was the truth. I was trying not to notice that she had a slim, elegant hour-glass figure.

"A fairy." Rika stared at me as if I were stupid. "You expect me to believe that?"

I shrugged. "I don't care." I tried to think of something else to say.

I couldn't.

Now I was trying not to notice how bright and interesting her violet eyes were.

"What is this?" Rika asked, now presenting the sphere to me.

"Well it's….a…sphere." I grinned guiltily, and hoped that would suffice.

It didn't.

"That's not good enough," Rika warned. And for a second, I was actually afraid she could do something to me. But then it occurred to me that I was a fairy. What could she do? She wouldn't 'capture' me, would she? I decided that she probably wouldn't. Rika wasn't like that.

"It's my sphere," I said. I successfully managed to stop thinking about how she looked, and was relieved to find that I could still think about her as I always had...as a good friend. "I made it, just because I wanted to." I hesitated. "I dropped it to see if it would break, and it rolled over to you."

Rika narrowed her eyes further, and then shrugged and decided that was okay. "Well look," she said, handing it back to me. "I don't appreciate you coming into my house, spying on me, and trying to scare me by sneaking up behind me. You think I didn't know that was coming?"

"I hoped you wouldn't, but I should have known better," I replied, grinning. I took the sphere back and looked down at it. My hair fell down to cover my eyes, and I brushed it away like I always used to do. When I looked back up at Rika, there was a spark of recognition in her eyes. She breathed in sharply, and her eyes watered slightly, but then she got herself under control. "What's wrong?" I asked. I felt that I already knew the answer.

"Nothing," she snapped. "I think you should go."

I nodded, and suddenly my expression fell. I was a stranger to her now, and we would never be the friends we used to be. That hurt just as much as saying good bye to Jeri had.

I turned and flew out, carrying my sphere in one hand, and thought that perhaps I should go back home…to my fairy home.

"Wait…"

Startled to hear Rika suddenly cry out after me, I turned around to look down at her. She was standing on her porch, and her expression told me that she was fighting with herself over something. "Yes?" I asked, suddenly hopeful.

"If you are a fairy…" she bit her lip, and didn't say anything else.

I lowered myself to the ground in front of her, and looked at her earnestly. I wanted her to finish what she was saying. "And I am," I said, encouraging her.

She stared at me tentatively. "Then…would you grant me a wish?"

I stared at the sphere in my hands…the sphere that showed no signs of breaking any time soon. I looked up at her and smiled. "Yes," I said. "For you I will."

She looked startled by that, but tried to ignore it. "I wish…" she paused. "Can I have an 'and' in my wish?"

I chuckled. "Why not? It always frustrated me that people couldn't have 'ands' in their wishes. Go ahead."

She almost smiled. "I wish that my dream I had last night would be true, and that the one I dreamt about would come here to tell me that it is." She spoke almost in a whisper, and I felt like I had just been let in on a huge secret. Except that I didn't know what it was.

And yet, somehow I felt that I knew exactly what she had dreamt about, even though I didn't. It was weird. I simply smiled at her and nodded. "It is true," I found myself saying, even though I didn't know why I was telling her this. "Because I'm here." And I didn't know why I said that, either.

Suddenly, my eyes widened, and realization hit me like a slug to the stomach. Without even realizing what she had dreamt, or even knowing what she had wished for, I had granted it. And I had no idea how I had done it. So I stood in front of her awkwardly, hoping that I'd know what was going on.

"You're…" she stared at me with eyes just as wide as my own. "You're…Takato?"

I blinked, suddenly completely confused. I nodded…

And Rika burst into tears.

(------)

Reviews would be nice….

rika195


	8. One for Joy, Two For Pain

Thank you for all of your kind reviews, and for your interest in my fairy tale. Merry Christmas, and God bless you!

(------)

Of all the people I have ever met in my entire life, no one is as strong as Rika. That is what I thought, even from the first moment I saw her in a dream so long ago. Rika is independent, cool, calm, and unafraid. And she is the strongest person I know. Not only could she beat anyone in a fair fight, but she was probably one of the strongest Tamers, too. Unlike me, she always knew what she was doing.

She's like ice on the outside, ice as thick and solid as the sphere that I created with my magic. She isn't necessarily cold toward her friends... I mean, she is…but she is also supportive and protective, and sometimes she laughs and is open with the rest of us. But for the most part, she is a closed door that is bolted shut with titanium locks and no handle on the outside.

No one really knew her, I think. They saw who she wanted to be, and who she made herself to be. But no one saw the side of her that she kept hidden in that un-crackable safe. At least, that is what I believe.

I used to wonder why Rika was so closed up, and why she always had to be so independent, why she wouldn't even let me open a door for her. Everyone wondered. But I was the only one who found out.

I happened to get lucky. At least, that is what I tell myself. I still remember the day on that runaway train, when Rika started to sing. She was looking right at me…but then, she was looking right through me into a place that I could never go.

"Dad I want to sing for you," she said, sounding so unlike the Rika I knew. "I want to sing!" And then she did.

I have never heard a more angelic voice. And I doubt I will ever hear it again.

It was on that day that I finally understood why she was so closed up. She's scarred on the inside, from when her father left her, and to get by she has convinced herself that she doesn't need anybody. But I would never have even dreamt about bringing up the topic to her, even to tell her that she didn't have to be afraid of talking to us. That could have gotten me killed. So of course, for my own health, I kept that whole singing thing a secret.

And oddly enough, Rika and I became better friends because of it. She seemed to mind my being around less that she used to, and though she still yelled at me to shut up sometimes, she stopped hitting me. Maybe she felt like she could trust me better.

But then I died. Heh. Ironic, almost.

But thinking back, I realize something very strange. Of all of Rika's friends, I was one of the very few who saw her at her worst, one of the very few who heard her really laugh and have fun, one of the only ones to ever see her get scared, and I am the only one who ever heard her sing. But never…EVER….did I ever see her cry.

Not like this.

I stood in front of her, shifting my weight back and forth from one foot to the other, and waited for her to stop crying. Rika never cries, so of course I thought she'd be done soon. But she just kept crying! I stood there like an idiot, wondering what I was supposed to do.

She was hugging herself, shaking with her sobs, her head hung down so that I wouldn't see her tears. For several minutes she cried like that, and then she simply lost it. Her knees gave out and she collapsed to the ground, still crying.

I was stunned. Could this really be Rika? Strong, indifferent, completely controlled and unafraid Rika? I opened my mouth to say something, but I didn't know what to say. So I kept standing there like an idiot.

Suddenly something dawned on me. I don't know how the thought came to me, because I wasn't thinking anything at the time, but it did. It was this: Before I died, Rika must have considered me one of her best friends, because I knew her better than anyone else had. So when I died, it must have…it must have hurt her a lot. To her, it must have been like her father leaving all over again!

A pang of guilt hit me in the stomach, and I suddenly understood. To have someone you trust more than anyone suddenly get ripped from you, and then present themselves to you a year later…it must be worse than torture. And here I was wondering why Rika wasn't acting as strong as she usually does.

I knelt down and grabbed her shoulders, helping her to stand. And then I hugged her.

Hugging Rika is something you just don't do, unless you have a death wish.

But in this case, she was too distraught to fight me.

She clung to me, sobs racking her body, and I continued to hold her in a hug and whisper comforting things to her. "It's okay Rika," I said. "I'm here," I said. "Don't worry. It's going to be alright. Everything's going to be alright."

But soon I ran out of things to say, and started repeating myself. Strangely, it seemed to work. Rika calmed down, until only shaky breathing remained of her astounding emotional outburst. Then even her breathing evened out.

I continued to hug her, because she showed no sign of wanting me to let go.

And I felt strange.

"Takato…" Rika whispered my name, almost as if she could hardly believe it was true. "You fell off the cliff. How can you be here?"

I found myself talking before I even knew what I was saying. "Remember your dream, Rika," I said. But even I didn't know what she had dreamed. I suppose it had something to do with me granting her wish.

Rika finally pulled away from me, and I let her go, giving her a look that asked if she was alright. She ignored it, looking at me intently with her bloodshot violet eyes. "You were rescued by fairies?" she asked. "And turned into a fairy?" She frowned, and then looked behind me at my wings. Her eyes widened. "And…you came to tell me! You really did! How did you know?"

I shrugged. I had absolutely no idea. "Anyway, that is what happened," I said slowly. "But nothing is the same anymore. I don't know what to do. For you it's been a year since I died…for me? One day." I sighed, suddenly frustrated. "How can I keep track of time?"

For a long moment we both stood in Rika's yard, silent. We were both thinking different thoughts, but we looked at each other as if we'd never seen the other before. Finally, tears welled up in Rika's eyes again, and she fought to keep them under control.

"You…you were my best friend," she whispered. "And then you were gone. And I never got to say good bye." A tear slipped from her cheek, and her hands by her sides clenched into fists with the effort of keeping the rest of her tears contained. "The last words I said to you before you fell were that you were worthless and annoying, and I wanted you to go home. Never once did I tell you…tell you…" the tears started falling faster. "..tell you how much you meant to me…"

"Hey, it's okay!" I said, smiling comfortingly. "I knew at the time that you were just being Rika. I didn't even notice that you called me those things. I just laughed and went home, because I knew that you could say something like that to me and I wouldn't mind. It's always been like that. You can always be yourself around me!"

"That's just it!" Rika hissed, clenching her hands even harder. "I could tell you anything I wanted, because you were the only one who understood me…who let me be myself and never questioned me or made me feel uncomfortable. You were a dork, but you were always there!" She coughed, and I guessed it was a cover up for a sob. "I could say anything I wanted, but I chose to say insults instead of the truth. Do you know how much that hurt after you were gone?"

I blinked, then shook my head. My eyes told her that I felt pained for her, that I didn't want her to hurt. I didn't want her to only have painful memories of me. I didn't want that at all.

"Rika," I said, taking a step toward her. She did not move away like she usually did. "I'm here…and I'm sorry. I don't want you to have painful memories about me. I don't want you to forget about me. I don't want to lose you." I suddenly found a tear slipping out of my eye, and I blinked, startled. Then I brushed it away. "When I woke up and found that I was a fairy, I found that I couldn't ever go back to the way that it used to be. I can't go home anymore. I can't hang out with my friends. I can't do anything like I used to. It's all gone! Everything! I even had to say good bye to Jeri!" Tears spilled from my eyes at the thought of Jeri's lovely face, crying as she drove away from me up there on the mountain. "I lost everything…and then I found you. I don't want to lose you again."

"Takato…" Rika closed her eyes, and an expression of pain crossed her features. She still stood rigidly a couple paces away from me. "Don't you even realize? Didn't you ever realize? Jeri never loved you the way you loved her. She thought you were cute, but she never liked you. She liked you as a friend and nothing more. She never wanted it to be any different." Rika opened her eyes and looked at me. "Even if you went back to see her, and told her you were alive, that would not change. She lost a friend who meant a lot to her. But she did not lose her love."

I stepped back, shocked. The words coming from Rika's mouth were edged, and once again I was coming face to face with the 100 mile thick wall made of ice. But I felt like I was beginning to understand something I had never been able to see before.

"You were oblivious to everyone because you loved Jeri," Rika said sharply. "And she didn't even know what she was missing. You were so in love with her that you couldn't see all the hints she kept giving you that she didn't want your love. She wanted your friendship. But you wouldn't see that. You just made it harder for her to say good bye, because she could never explain how she felt without hurting you."

"I…I'm sorry…" I stuttered, another tear or two slipping down my cheeks. They were hot, yet they felt like ice on my skin. "I couldn't help it…"

"I know." Rika's eyes softened slightly, but she looked even more hopeless. "I know. Because I felt the same way about you."

"You felt…" I stopped and my eyes widened, my mouth opening slightly. I swallowed. Did Rika just admit that…that she…

"I'm sorry, Takato," Rika whispered. "I could never tell you the truth because I was angry. I was angry that you wouldn't notice me, that all you ever thought about was Jeri, and she didn't even want your love at all." Rika wiped her face and turned away, trying to regain control. "I don't even want to think right now, I am so messed up. I feel like my heart is torn, and I don't know what to do. I can't even be glad to see you, because you're just going to break my heart again." She sighed weakly. "That's what happens when I let go. I just get hurt."

She walked into the house, and she did not want me to follow. She just walked in and closed the door, like she had always done.

And I turned and left, like I had always done.

Only this time, I felt like I had been stabbed through the heart with a jagged knife made of ice.

I had a lot of thinking to do.

(------)

Reviews would be nice…

Rika195


	9. Finding Purpose Again

_Thank you so much for all your kind and encouraging reviews_

_Thank you so much for all your kind and encouraging reviews! I'm sorry I haven't continued sooner.** LittleFirefly44, black peeches, Crazyeight,** and **Kuroy,** this chapter is for you. You kept me going when I felt inclined to stop and give up on this story._

(--)

I couldn't even see, couldn't even think, but I didn't want to lose any more time. Do you know what it's like to stay in one place, with absolutely nothing in your mind, and suddenly realize that you'd missed the entire day? For me it was worse. I could stand there, trying to sort out my feelings for Jeri and for Rika, for hours and hours, and then find out it had been tens of thousands of years instead. I couldn't stand to lose any more time, to lose the chance to make things right with my friends before it was too late. So I fought with myself to stay in the mortal time zone.

If that makes any sense at all.

Maybe I was trying to think about what Rika said, or about what I should do or think. But when I finally realized that I hadn't been thinking anything at all, it was night, and the sun just set over the water.

I sighed, trying to loosen the muscles in my neck and shoulders as I did so. I had escaped to my favorite beach after leaving Rika's house, since it didn't take very long for me to fly here. It used to take an hour and a half just to drive. Now…I could get here in five minutes.

The sound of the wind and the waves was comforting to me, and the coolness of the wind and the warmth of the sun seemed to give me strength. And though I felt miserable, I was reminded…

I was alive.

At least that was something, right?

"Are you an angel?"

I blinked, surprised at hearing another voice in my solitude, and turned to look down at my side. A small child—she couldn't be more than 5 years old—looked up at me expectantly. Her dark hair was a mess, and her large round eyes were serious and doubt-free. I knew without a doubt that she would believe me if I told her I was a fairy, and for some reason, that gave me a swell of strength. And smiling, I reached down to pick her up.

"Well, are you?" she demanded.

"I'm afraid not," I answered, somehow drawn to this child like a moth to a flame. I vaguely remembered reading somewhere that the mythical beings called fairies loved children. I guess I could understand that now. "Angels are different," I tried to explain. I just told her what I believed. "They are God's messengers, who protect people from bad things. I'm just a fairy."

"Do you grant wishes?" she asked, reaching a hand to stroke my hair, as though to fix a few strands that were being blown about my nose. "Mommy said that fairies grant wishes if you catch them, and I caught you."

I smiled, amused. "Are you sure?" I asked. "Maybe I caught you!"

"That's what I want you to think," she said matter-of-factly. "Will you grant my wish?"

"I don't know," I answered honestly. "What is it?" Somehow I felt I couldn't lie to her, like that would be so wrong. So I decided not to.

"Mommy is very sick," she said, staring at the sand. "Daddy says she's going to go away. I don't want her to go away. I want you to make her better."

I felt my heart lurch with sadness for her, and was reminded of Rika all over again. Oh Rika….how could I have been so blind? I blinked back tear and held the child close. "I'm so sorry," I said sadly. "I know how much that hurts. But…I will try my best. Can you take me to your house?"

She nodded, just letting me hug her as if it were the most normal thing in the world, and pointed to an apartment complex a few blocks away. "Over there," she said.

I flew over, then landed on the ground in front of the complex. She squealed in delight, and I grinned. I always wanted her to laugh like that. "Which one?" I asked, setting her down and taking her hand.

She started walking, and I followed, deciding that I needed to disguise myself. If it were true that very few people could see me, I still wanted those who could to only see a person, not a fairy with wings. I concentrated, eyes closed, until I could visualize my wings disappearing. Then I felt different, like something was missing. When I opened my eyes and turned around, my wings were gone.

I shrugged. Sure, I missed them already, but I could get them back any time. Right?

The girl led me into her small apartment, to her parents room. The place was small and cramped, and almost everything was boxed up as though they were moving.

"Daddy says we can't stay here anymore," the girl explained quietly, putting a finger to her mouth to indicate I should be quiet. I nodded with a smile. "He says its better to try to make Mommy better than to live in a nice house."

I almost dropped my mouth open in horror, but kept it closed. How sad!

She led me to a futon, where a pale and thin woman lay sleeping restlessly. Several quilts were tucked around her, and she perspired in a fever, and shivered from chills. Her husband was sitting beside her, holding her hand and leaning against the wall. He too was asleep.

The little girl pointed, and then stood there staring. Her eyes were wide with fear and sadness, and yet with absolute surety that I could do something.

Tears slipped from my cheeks. "I'm so sorry," I whispered, kneeling beside the woman and laying my hand on her head. I didn't really know what to do, but I took a deep breath and just let it out.

What came out next just seemed natural.

"A wish for healing," I whispered, closing my eyes and letting me tears fall, "from this little child, has touched my heart. May you be blessed with health and long life, that this sickness may pass and never return. You are loved and precious to many people, and many people will aid you in your recovery. May you always be provided for."

Warmth and coolness at the same time seemed to flow from my body into hers, like a gentle wind. The coolness took away her fever, and the warmth her chills. And she slept peacefully without pain.

Suddenly exhausted, I stood and wobbled on my feet. A familiar weight on my back made me realize that I'd used quite a bit of energy, and the disappearing spell on my wings had vanished. Oh well.

"Is she better?" the girl asked, eyes even wider than before.

"She will be," I promised. I smiled, realizing now that the woman was a kind and precious soul, loved by many people. "She will not get sick like this again, I think."

"Will we have to move?" the girl asked hopefully.

"I think not," I replied with a yawn.

The girl was quiet, for a long time, just staring. Finally, she looked up at me with a frown. "Are you sure?" she demanded. "I don't want to leave."

"I'm sure," I chuckled quietly. And just to make sure she believed me, I placed my hand on her head and said, "may you be blessed and always provided for, so that you will not have to leave any home except by your choosing." Again the warmth and coolness flowing from me into her, and she giggled as though being tickled.

At that moment, her father woke up.

"Chiaki-chan?" he asked groggily, sitting up and rubbing his eyes. "Are you alright?"

"Yes Daddy," she said demurely. "Mommy's all better now."

Her dad sighed, sadly, and pulled his daughter over to sit in his lap. "She'll get better," he whispered. "She will."

"She is better! The fairy said so! I caught him, and he granted my wish!" she grinned and pointed at me excitedly. "See? He's tired now. Can he sleep here? He said we wont have to move anymore."

Her father looked up, frowning, but he could not see me. But his glance fell upon his wife. Instantly he noticed the change, how peacefully she slept, and how her color was coming back. He leaned forward and held her hand tighter. "Sakura?" he whispered, too afraid to hope. "Sakura my love…."

And in a moment I will never forget in my entire life…she opened her eyes and looked up at her husband. Then she smiled.

I just watched as the three of them broke out into happy conversation and excitement, running here and there to get Sakura anything she wanted. Neither father nor daughter could even contain themselves. And she just smiled, tears slipping down the sides of her face into her ears, shaking her head and saying she was fine, she didn't need anything. I felt such peace, like I could never in my life do anything more fulfilling than what I'd just done here.

I stepped backwards, heading for the door to leave, but not wanting to miss the sight of the happy reunion. Nevertheless, I couldn't stay, and I knew it. I was about to turn and leave when, with a sudden frown of confusion, the man looked up.

And he saw me.

Our eyes met, and we just stared at each other in silence. It was like we were frozen, unable to move, and for a moment I was afraid.

But then he nodded at me, thanking me with his eyes and his heart. I smiled back, nodding a farewell. "You have many friends," I whispered. "And you and your family will never have to leave a home unless by your own choosing." I repeated the blessing I'd given the daughter, and then decided to add one final message. "I hope you show others just as much kindness as you have been shown today."

"We will," he nodded.

And I turned and left, flying away and leaving them to share in their special moment together. I was grinning, exhilarated with what I had done, and I felt like I had finally done something right since I'd become a fairy. It felt so great!

But I was tired, and I needed sleep. I would have gone home, but I feared losing track of time again. So I went to the only place I knew I could be safe, and landed on the roof. It was a warm night, so I figured Rika wouldn't mind if I slept on her roof. She wouldn't even know I was there.

I laid down in a cleft where I couldn't be seen, and closed my eyes...

and I slept with a smile for the first time since I'd fallen off the cliff.

(--)

_Anything to offer? I appreciate your comments or critiques._

_Rika195_


	10. Healing

Thank you so much for all your kind and encouraging reviews!

(--)

I used to wish I was a cat, when I was young. I would watch them, sleeping curled up in the sun without a care in the world, and wish that I could enjoy such luxuries. They soaked in the warmth, sleeping all day, and then went exploring at night when all the interesting things were awake.

I was always jealous. Cats didn't have homework, or alarms that made them get up at 7:00 every morning.

And yet, here I was, tucked away in a small niche on Rika's roof, sleeping in the sun.

It was sooooo nice and warm, no cares, no thoughts, just soaking up the warmth.

Like a cat.

Gradually, however, I began to wake up. I used to be a morning person, and I remembered waking up energized long before anyone else. Sure I liked to take naps, but there was nothing so special about waking up while it was still dark, wrapping up in a blanket and slipping my feet into some warm slippers, and heading up to the roof to watch the sun rise.

As soon as that memory came flooding back to me, I was wide awake, realizing that I'd missed it.

I'd missed the sunrise.

"At least it's a nice day," I yawned and stretched, enjoying the warmth of the sun and the chill of the breeze. I sighed and took a look around, enjoying the view.

Then I nearly jumped out of my skin.

"RIKA!" I exclaimed, jumping into the air, startled out of my wits. She was seated beside me, on the roof, staring at me blankly. I had absolutely no idea how long she'd been there, or that she'd been there at all. "W-what are you doing up here? Heh-heh…." I scratched the back of my head sheepishly, then landed back on the roof.

My heart was racing, adrenaline pumping, and I felt stupid. _Stupid, stupid Takato! This is HER roof! What are YOU doing here? _

As if reading my thoughts, she narrowed her eyes and glared at me. "What are YOU doing here?" she stressed.

I gulped. Rika always scared me when she was upset, but this time it wasn't just her being cross. I could feel the waves of hurt and bitterness coming off of her…towards me. I hung my head in shame. "I…." I struggled to find words for my reasons. "It's hard for me to keep track of time in the Fairy Kingdom," I mumbled guiltily. "I didn't want…..I don't want to lose anymore time. I don't want to wake up and suddenly find that….that it's years later…..like last time. I couldn't bear it….."

Tears dripped out of my eyes so fast I couldn't catch them in time, but I wiped them off quickly and took a deep breath so as to stop more from coming out.

"And I was tired," I admitted. "I don't think I could have made it all the way back."

She just started at me in dark silence, as though she weren't even thinking anything at all. Just sitting there.

Like I was, yesterday.

I looked at her cautiously, and noticed the dark circles under her eyes, and the red veins in the whites of them. She'd stayed up all night crying…..because of me.

Why could I only cause people pain? Why? Why? WHY?

I turned away, hands clenched into fists. "This isn't fair!" I blurted, hurt in my voice. "I don't want to hurt you, Rika! I never wanted to! I just wanted to be there for you….and I couldn't even do that!" I took a few steps backwards, preparing to leave, and yet hesitant to do so. "I'm so sorry……"

I turned to leave.

"So am I," I heard her whisper. She sighed, then stood up. "But there really isn't anything we can do about it, is there? We can't change the past."

"No," I replied darkly. But I turned around and gave her a compassionate look. "But if anything, I'm glad that I could finally open my eyes. You helped me do that, Rika. You were right, yesterday, about what you said."

This was hard for me to say. I had been avoiding thinking about it, but I knew I couldn't go on until I got through it.

"I had always known in my heart that Jeri didn't feel the same way that I felt about her. It was cruel of me to expect so much from her….I mean, I always tried to be there for her, even when she didn't even want to be my friend anymore. But maybe I just scared her off. I was wrong, and I knew it. I just didn't want to get hurt….I didn't want to let go of my first love." I choked on the words as I spilled them out. "And I'm sorry…..that I didn't realize….I just….I don't want to lose what we had. It's hard for me to think that you and I can't be friends again."

"I never said that," Rika sighed, closing her eyes. She was so tired, so drained. "It's just hard for me to deal with."

I stood there, silent, and wrestled with my feelings. And yet….I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Maybe I had finally come to terms with what I'd known all along…..that Jeri wasn't the girl for me….that she couldn't be what I was trying to make her be.

I let out a sigh of my own.

"I need to apologize to her, somehow," I whispered.

Rika just nodded.

"But how?"

"Just apologize."

"But…..I'm dead to her."

"You're not dead to any of us, Takato." Rika's words were hurt. "My father is dead to me, but he's still alive. You were dead…but you weren't dead to us." She opened her eyes and stared at me, her violet eyes holding mine so that I couldn't look away. "She needs to hear you say it. We all need to hear you say it."

"I'm sorry," I said. But this time, it wasn't because I was sorry for myself. I knew she was right. So I told her so. "You're right," I said. "You usually are."

At that, I got the first real smile I'd seen since…..well…..a year ago. And I smiled in response.

"That's better," she snapped. And she almost sounded like the old Rika.

"So I need to tell everyone I'm alive, then?" I frowned. Somehow, that didn't seem right. "I don't think that's a good idea. Not all of them will be able to see me."

Rika frowned, but suddenly her eyes widened. "I have an idea," she whispered. "I'm going to have everyone come to my house….to call a meeting. We haven't really talked about you since you…."

"Died?"

She frowned slightly, as though she didn't like me repeating it. "Yeah. We need to talk about you. We aren't going to be able to get through this unless we do. Anyway, I want you to come, and I want you to sit with us. If everyone can see you, then you can tell everyone what happened. But if they can't, then I want you to tell everyone who can to not say anything. I don't want to hurt anyone any more than they have to by telling them to look for something they can't see."

I nodded. That felt more right to me.

"I have to warn you though…..it might get pretty emotional." She hesitated. "And awkward."

"Would it be better if I came in after the meeting?" I asked, grinning sheepishly. "I don't want it to be awkward for you…."

"No, I want you to be there….but stay hidden for a while." She took a deep breath. "I want you to hear how much you meant to us. I don't want you to be sad forever either. I think…..I think you're in as much pain as we are."

I tried _really _hard not to let my tears fall out, but she noticed my watery eyes.

She wiped hers. "Gosh, I hate being so emotional! It's so awful feeling!"

I grinned and coughed a bit. "Me too, but then you've always told me I'm a cry-baby."

"Sensitive," Rika corrected with a smirk. "And a little more emotional than most guys. Course, you _did_ go overboard by crying at the movie Lilo and Stitch…."

I laughed out loud, surprised by how relieved my laugh sounded. It felt nice, too. "What?" I demanded in my defense. "He was waiting the forest, with the book, saying 'I'm lost!' and nobody came for him! How can that not be sad?"

"Oh shut up!" Rika punched my arm playfully.

We laughed and chuckled for a bit….and then quieted down. Rika sat back down on the roof, and I joined her, staring out at the city in the distance. I felt a lot better than I had in a long, long time.

"I'm glad you came back," Rika whispered, after a moment. "I know you never liked me like you did Jeri…but you were always there for me. That meant more to me than anything. So….thanks."

"Any time," I promised. "I'll be around for a lot longer this time."

She grew worried at that. "How long?" she blurted.

I stared at her, then blinked. "I….don't know! I have no idea how long fairies live. But I don't think we live forever! We just have magic, that's all. Sure, I can't fall to my death anymore, and I can separate myself from the flow of Time if I wanted to….by the way, I'm trying very hard not to, so I think I age the same you do…." I sighed, trying to sort my thoughts out. "I just don't know very much about being a fairy. I've only been one for a month and three days…." I stopped. "Or….A year…..in actuality…."

"So you can still die?" she sounded hesitant and relieved at the same time.

"I think so. At least, I know I can get captured."

"What do you mean?"

I sighed and gave her a helpless look. "All I know is that humans can catch me and make me grant them wishes. I don't know how, but I know I can grant wishes. I did last night. That's what made me so tired. But if they capture me, I have to do what they say. I become their slave. If that happens, and the person is evil….they could make me do all sorts of terrible things."

Rika's eyes widened. "Wow, so you could be in real danger!"

"Maybe you could protect me," I teased.

She wasn't joking when she replied with just a serious look. I grew serious too….because I realized what the look meant. She would protect me with her life if she had to, just like I would protect her with mine.

"I'm going to call the others," she said eventually, standing up and heading toward the door into the attic. I followed her, not really wanting to be left alone for some reason. "Are you hungry?"

I didn't know, so I shrugged.

But then my stomach growled.

"I guess you can eat," she smirked. "Come downstairs and wait in the kitchen. I'll be there in a minute."

I nodded, and went down the retractable stairs from the attic to her one-floor, old-style, expensive Japanese house. Her house was always so impressive to me, but I'd been there so many times it felt familiar to me. Like home, almost.

I found my way to the kitchen easily.

Several minutes later, she came down wearing a new outfit, since she hadn't changed since yesterday, and she set her cell phone down on the counter with a sigh. "I've been sighing a lot today," she commented. "Feels good."

I just nodded. For some reason, ever since I'd come back, Rika was much more open with me. It was like all of her walls had dropped, and I hadn't even noticed. Was it because I finally understood? Because she finally told me everything that had been weighing her down? Whatever it was, I hoped that it wouldn't change. I liked this.

"So…."

I waited. "So?" I prompted.

"So what do you want to eat?"

I shrugged. "Toast?"

At that, she smiled in amusement. "Oh good, something easy." She popped a piece of bread into the toaster, and then hopped onto the counter. "What do you want on it?"

I opened my mouth to say "butter and peanut butter," but was interrupted before I could say anything.

Rika's Grandmother walked into the room, looking a little surprised. "Is someone here?" she asked Rika, walking over to her and giving her a kiss on the forehead.

Rika brushed it off with a grimace and an embarrassed look. "Just talking to myself," she murmured. "It's easier than talking to nobody."

Her Grandmother's eyes held a lot of hurt and compassion, and she patted Rika's face. "You look better today," she said. "But you look like you haven't slept a wink! You better go take a nap. And eat something more than toast, okay?"

"I will…." Rika droned, hoping her Grandmother would leave.

"Your Mother will be back in time for dinner….is there anything you want tonight?"

Rika was about to brush her off again, but noticed me waiting patiently for her to be done, and thought better of it. "Actually yeah," she said slowly. "I was thinking….well I want to invite some friends over to spend the night. My old group of friends. We need…..we need to talk about Takato, and none of us are doing it. I think I need to start, or no one is going to get over this."

Her Grandma gave her a proud and incredulous look, then burst into tears. "Oh Rika…." She hugged her, ignoring her granddaughter's uncomfortable look.

I slipped out of the room, smiling at Rika to let her know she could have a moment alone, and went outside. I was glad….very glad….because I knew she was healing. It gave me hope….that perhaps, I could keep my old friendships after all. Just because I was a fairy didn't mean I could still be there for them, no matter what Samas or the ice fairy said!

I caught a fleeting color yellow from the corner of my eye, and turned quickly to see what it was.

But it was gone before I could see it. Frowning, I stood there and wondered.

Should I be worried? Or was it just a bird?

I didn't know, so I waited. Rika would come get me when she was ready, anyway.

(--)

Comments? Critiques? Love em. Lay em on me!

-Rika195


	11. Renamon

First, I just want to say that it's snowed a TON over here, and it's freezing! That's so rare for me! Wow! And second…

Thanks so much to all my reviewers! You guys are the reason I haven't forgotten about this story, and I am dedicating this chapter to you guys: **mhmmm**, **Crazyeight**, **Chaos** **Blademaster**, **Booklover13**, and **Rubberman2025**. Thank you!

-

(------)

-

Yellow.

Such an interesting color, found only in the most exotic of places.

Flowers were yellow, and so were birds. Some of them, anyway. But as for other things that were naturally yellow, I couldn't really think of any. Especially something as big as the flash of yellow I had just seen.

Could it be…

"Takato? What are you doing out here?" Rika's voice interrupted my sluggish train of thought, and she stepped outside to stand beside me. "Do you want your toast or not?"

I stared at her blankly for a moment, afraid to lose where my thoughts were going. I had just seen a flash of yellow, and if it was even remotely possible that it had been what I thought it was, then… But I resisted opening my mouth and asking Rika about it. She had been in such pain losing Renamon. If I asked her about it, and it _wasn't _Renamon… I couldn't do that to her. Not now. I would just find out on my own.

"Don't go all quiet on me like that," Rika whispered, her face falling. "It scares me."

"Scares you?" I asked, putting on a smile. "Why?"

"Because it's not like you. You're never…quiet. Like that." She shivered. "I just don't like thinking about how different you are…how different everything is now. It's like a dream I can't wake up from, except that the real dream is that I'll wake up and find you never died in the first place. Reality's a dream now. You're like my hallucination, someone that not everybody can see. I mean, maybe I'm the _only_ one who can see you! It didn't really bother me before, because I was desperate enough to take anything, even a hallucination. But when Grandma couldn't see you….."

She was shaking hard now—not shivers, hyperventilating. Without even thinking, I instinctively wrapped my arms around her and let a comforting warmth flow around her. "It's okay Rika, don't freak out," I whispered. Truth was, I was freaking out. If Rika couldn't handle knowing about me, maybe it was better for me to not let anyone else know I was still alive. I could be hurting people more than I was comforting them, and I couldn't do that. I _wouldn't. _Not if I had any say in it…

The warmth must have helped, because she stopped shaking fairly quickly. She didn't pull away though, shrinking closer to my chest as if she would collapse if I weren't holding her up. "But it's not so bad," she said in a small voice, continuing from where she'd left off, even though several minutes had passed since she'd last spoken. "You're so different…so fantasy-like that it's easy to get used to. And I'm okay, really…I'm just…I'm emotionally overwhelmed. It's a lot to sort through if you're not used to it."

I smiled. "You were always one for holding in your feelings until you exploded," I teased. "This is probably good for you."

She did pull away then, punching me in the arm with a mock-annoyed face. "Come get your toast," she ordered, then turned her back and walked inside, expecting me to follow. Of course I did. It felt so natural to just do whatever that she wanted. She'd always bossed me and Henry around, and we were used to just doing it. We didn't really want to get punched or anything if we didn't do what she ordered us to do, but this wasn't like that. It was just…natural. There really was no other word for it.

She handed me a plate when we reached the kitchen, and I munched quietly on the two buttered pieces that sat lukewarm upon it. While I chewed she pulled out her cell phone and began to dial Henry's number. I knew it was Henry's, because I had memorized the little tune that the buttons played whenever I dialed it. It made me smile to know that I hadn't forgotten that.

"Hey Henry," Rika said, sounding surprised that he had answered, "good to hear your voice after all this time."

My ears, much sharper now as a fairy, could easily pick out the words that came through from Henry's side. _"Yeah," _he said quietly, sounding as though he were just as surprised to hear Rika's voice. _"It's been a long time. Why are you calling?" _

He certainly didn't beat around the bush.

But Rika preferred it that way. "We haven't spoken since the funeral," she said, momentarily choking up. "And I regret that. It's hard…not seeing anyone anymore. So I'm having a little get together at my house tonight. I want to talk to everyone."

"_Wow. When you do something, you do it. What exactly are we talking about when we get there?" _

"What we should have talked about before," Rika's voice broke. "I want to talk about Takato. I want there to be closure. I want to be able to see you guys again, and not feel like there's a gaping hole causing us pain. I just don't like it."

Henry was very silent for a long time. Finally he let out a sigh. _"I know what you mean." _

"Can you come?"

"_I don't know Rika, I'll think about it. This is kind of sudden." _

"But it's important. Please Henry…think _quickly _about it. I need to talk to you" Rika had never really pleaded so pitifully before, and it made me want to put my arms around her again. I resisted though, as I had a keen sense that she would be upset if I did. So I resisted.

Henry seemed to feel just as affected. _"Oh Rika…I'm sorry, I didn't realize you were…I mean…yeah I'll think about. I'll call you back in a bit, okay?" _

Rika sucked in a shaky breath, and then nodded. But since Henry couldn't see her, she replied, "Okay." Then she hung up. "One down, five to go." She turned and gave me a fake smile. "Wish me luck."

"Good luck?" I offered with a shrug.

She shrugged back and dialed another number. It answered on the first ring. _"RIKA?" _the shrill voice of Suzie squeaked from the other side. _"YOU'RE CALLING ME? WHAT HAPPENED?" _

Rika chuckled, holding the phone away from her ear a few feet until Suzie stopped screeching. "Nothing," she answered. "Well, nothing really…I just…I wanted to tell you that I'm having a meeting at my house later today. It's so we can talk about…about Takato. Do you think you could come?"

"_I don't know…if Henry goes I'll be able to come. But it he doesn't…I don't think I can. It's been hard for all of us, especially since we don't really see each other any more. But it's been especially hard on Henry. He has nightmares you know." _

"No, I didn't know," Rika whispered, casting a glance at me. For all she knew, I couldn't hear what was being said.

"_Yeah, but he'd never say anything about it to anyone. Only reason I know is cause I hear him at night." _She sighed heavily. _"If you can get him to talk, l bet it will help. So I'll do my best to get him to go." _

"Thanks Suzie. You're the best."

"_No problem. And hey, it's good to hear from you, Rika. I miss hanging out with you." _

"Yeah, me too," Rika replied. "But this not-hanging-out's going to change, if I can get everyone to come. I promise."

"_Then I'll see you later! Little Sis' has got a job to do!" _Suzie hung up with a passion, ready to bug Henry into going.

Rika shook her head as she hung up, her eyes tearing up. "Oh Henry," she whispered. "Please come." She didn't waste another second dialing the next number, and I recognized the tune once again. This time it was Kenta's phone. Like Suzie, he answered on the first ring with a fumbled "hello?" like he was suffocating. "Hey Kenta," Rika said, smiling to herself. She'd never called him before, not for anything. When she needed to contact him or Kazu, she'd always made me call them. So this was a big deal. "I'm having a meeting at my house tonight. Do you think you can come? We need to talk…all of us."

"_Talk?" _Kenta choked. _"About what?" _

"About Takato."

I could feel Kenta's hurt in the silence that followed. Oh Kenta…

"Can you come?"

"_I…yeah. Sure." _His voice was dead, like he didn't really want to talk about it. But how could he refuse Rika? He couldn't. No one was ever able to, no one except Ryo. But I had a feeling he wouldn't refuse her this time.

"Thanks Kenta." She hung up, not wanting to draw on the conversation any longer. It was too awkward for both of them. She made the call to Kazu even shorter than Kenta's, telling him to come to her house tonight for a meeting with our group. To talk about me. He was too surprised at being contacted by her to say no, and she hung up as quickly as she'd called. Still, it was hurting me even more to hear how much pain my death had caused all of my best friends. I didn't know how much more I could take.

"Hey Ryo…" Rika said, interrupting my hesitant thoughts. She looked more awkward than when she'd called Kazu and Kenta. "Are you in town?"

In town? I frowned in confusion. Where was Ryo these days?

"_Um…that depends…" _Ryo droned, sounding incredibly intrigued to be getting this kind of call from Rika. He wasn't even sure what to think. _"You doing okay?" _

"Well…actually…" Rika cleared her throat, blushing. "I'm having a meeting at my house today. I know you didn't hang out with Takato as much as we all did, but you were still one of his closest friends. And…well…I haven't seen anyone since the funeral. So, I was hoping that you could come join us tonight so we could just talk about it together. I don't like the way things are going. It's…lonely. And painful."

Ryo was quiet for almost a minute. _"Wow," _he finally said, breathing out slowly. _"That was quite a mouthful…and certainly something I didn't expect to hear from you of all people." _

"Stop it," Rika snapped. "I'm being serious."

"_So am I. Look Rika, I don't play games when I talk to you, cause I know you don't like it. I just say things the way they are. You wouldn't listen to me if I said anything that wasn't the truth. The least you could do is just listen to me." _He sighed, thinking over his words for another minute or so. Rika didn't press him. Finally, he shrugged. I wasn't quite sure how I knew that, but he did. _"I can be there, if that's what you want. Takato was a good friend to me, better than I deserve. I at least owe him that. I'd like to talk about it. It might…help."_

"Good," Rika breathed, sounding like she'd been holding her breath while Ryo was thinking. "So I'll see you tonight?"

"_Yeah. Course." _He hesitated for a moment. _"And Rika?" _

Rika held her breath again, frozen like a statue for whatever he would say next.

"_You can call me any time, okay? I told you that last year, and it's still the same. I know we never got along that great, and I'm sorry about that. I never wanted to be your enemy. I always wanted to be there for you, if you'd just let me." _

"I know," Rika whispered. Her face was strangely pale. "Thank you."

"_Wow, I even get a thank you?" _

"Ryo…" her expression changed instantly to one of annoyance.

"_I know, I know. Just, think about it, okay? I'm not your enemy. I'm your friend."_

"Hence, I'm calling you," Rika replied sourly. "See you later." She hung up without giving him time to reply. And I couldn't explain my sudden relief that the conversation was over. Weird. I'd always thought Rika was being ridiculous with her enmity of Ryo. Now? I just felt glad she'd hung up.

What was coming over me?

"I just have one more," she said, breaking my concentration again. I looked up and met her eyes, my stomach suddenly feeling like a bowling ball inside me. "It'll only take a minute…"

I nodded. But I couldn't stay and hear it. "I'll just be on the roof," I said apologetically, flying out the door and heading up as fast as I could. Maybe I'd accepted what Rika said was true. But it was still painful for me.

_Jeri…_

I landed on the roof, pulled my knees to my chest, and wrapped my arms around them, trying to crush away the pain that ate away my heart. It didn't work, but it felt better than standing openly like some shredded up piece of paper. The analogy didn't work very well, but it felt that way to me anyway. I tried as hard as I could not to listen to the words that floating unbidden up to my hideout, but I heard them anyway.

"…Do you think you can come?"

"_Oh Rika…I…" _

"I'm sorry Jeri…it's important."

"_I know…I…*sob* I'll be there. It's just hard for me…you know?" _

"Jeri…*sigh* How many times have I told you? It wasn't your fault!"

"_You don't understand! If it wasn't for me…" _

"He still would have gone down and helped that girl! Wouldn't he?"

"…"

"Wouldn't he, Jeri? You know how he is!" Rika choked on her words for a moment, then corrected herself. "…how he _was. _Look, Takato would have done whatever he thought was the right thing to do, no matter what. Okay? It wasn't your fault."

Jeri thought it was _her fault? _I dropped my head to my knees and groaned. Why did I have to fall off that stupid cliff? It had only caused no end of trouble for everyone!

"You can't blame her, Takato, for thinking that."

I dashed into the sky, gasping horribly at the shock of hearing an unfamiliar voice. It took me a full three seconds of being completely freaked out to realize that…actually I did know that voice! I landed on the roof again, mouth hanging open at the impressive sight of Renamon herself. She stood on the roof next to me, watching me with her glowing blue eyes as though she pitied me. Though I could not explain why that bothered me.

"She was the one who asked you to go down that cliff, wasn't she?" Renamon asked, continuing her thought with an accusing edge to it.

I hesitated before answering, thinking back to that fateful day. Yes, she had asked me to help that girl, though I couldn't now remember anything about her. But I didn't do it because she forced me to. I wanted to help. I wanted to prove to her that… Oh. I sighed. "She would see it that way, wouldn't she?" I asked quietly, berating myself in my mind. "But it wasn't. It wasn't her fault."

"In a way, it was. And she will always see it that way." Renamon sighed, shaking her head at me sadly. "You must accept that, and if you can, try to get her to forgive herself. Even if you don't blame her, she will always blame herself; always remember that her last words to you were not kind."

"But how do you know all of this? And…what are you doing here? Does Rika know that you're…."

"No, she doesn't." Renamon hung her head, obviously saddened by that. "I've tried many times to talk to her, but she can't see or hear me. I suppose the only reason you can is because you're magic. You couldn't before though, when you fell."

"You were there?" I gaped at her. "Why?"

"I don't stay here all the time," she shrugged, staring out at the horizon. "I've been here for several years now, unable to get home, and unable to take full form here. Maybe it's because I'm not happy anywhere; like I don't know where I belong."

"That's sad…" I murmured. And it was. I personally understood how she felt more than I could even say. Is that why she was talking to me? Or did she just wish to talk to _somebody? _

"I was there that day because…well…I'm not sure why," she said, going back to my question. It was nice of her to not weasel her way out of answering, even though I'd already forgotten. "I tended to follow you around sometimes because you were always so energetic. I never felt depressed around you like I do around Rika. She's so hard to stay around…when she can't even hear me…"

I reached out a hand to comfort her, then pulled it back awkwardly. This was Renamon…and I didn't know how she'd take it. "Renamon…I…want to help you!"

"You do, Takato. Just being here, you help me." Her blue eyes locked with mine. "I can't protect her, can't comfort her, can't do anything but watch. And like her, I have always been affected by you."

"By me?" I whispered. Renamon? Affected by me?

"The feelings of my Tamer rub off on me. She has always been comforted and cheered by your presence. I find myself feeling the same." Renamon chuckled. "So please, promise me that you'll take care of her, as best you can?"

"I promise!" I agreed whole-heartedly. I would have promised it in a moment. "But…why are you asking me this? Where are you going?"

Her eyes widened in surprise. "You _are_ more perceptive now, aren't you?" she asked. She chuckled again to herself. "I am going back to the Digital World for a while, like I should have done years ago. I couldn't then, because my heart ached to protect Rika. I cannot, and so I am leaving that job up to you. Please, Takato, take good care of her." She began to walk away, silent and elegant in her pace. "Perhaps I will find what I'm looking for when I get there."

"And perhaps you wont!" I blurted, running after her. "Renamon, you know why you came back here! You and Rika are chained together, just like Guilmon and me! You'll never be happy if you're separated from her! Can't you see that! If she could see you, things would be different! Wouldn't they? You'd stay if she could, wouldn't you?"

"She cannot, even if what you say is true."

"Well…then…" I huffed, stopping in my tracks, and glared at her back until she turned to look at me. "Wish for it," I ordered.

She stared at me like I was insane. "What do you mean?" she asked.

"Just what I said! Wish for it! Wish for Rika to be able to see you and hear you, and interact with you!" I felt like stamping my foot, but that would have been dumb.

She just shook her head. "Takato, I cannot wish. I do not have the faith or belief of a child, for such a wish to come true. Nothing would happen."

A wave of nausea washed over me, causing me to momentarily lose my footing. I caught myself, straightened, and frowned in concern. What a strange feeling… "Don't say that," I said, more to prevent her words from hurting me than to comfort her. "You've never tried to wish, or to belief, so how can you know? I'll bet you've made wishes before that have come true! Like when you first digivolved. You wished then!"

"How do you know?" Renamon accused. "You weren't there."

"No…" I stuttered for a second. "But…I….know. Okay? I _know _that you made a wish, and because _Rika _believed in you, you were able to digivolve! That was all it took! You wished, and she believed. It can happen again! Don't you want her to be able to see you?"

"Takato, I don't…"

"DON'T SAY IT!" I had suddenly flown over to her so fast, I wasn't aware I'd moved. I blinked when I realized my hand was over her mouth, and awkwardly, I stepped away. "Don't say it," I whispered feebly. "It hurts."

Her expression showed confusion, but also understanding. She nodded. "Very well. But I cannot make this wish today. I must have time to think. It is not easy for one like me to have the heart of a child, not when my partner is no longer one. Give me some time."

"Okay," I sighed. But I glared at her. "Just remember though, that you have to come back and make that wish. And when you do, I'll grant it for you. I promise."

She nodded, then smiled. It was a smile filled with relief…and hope. Then, she vanished completely from sight.

"Good bye, Renamon," I whispered to the air, before turning back to return to Rika. "I'll see you soon." I walked down the stairs, trying not to look forlorn, but I pondered her words as deeply as I could. "And thanks," I added as an afterthought, smiling faintly. "I think I know what to say to Jeri now."

Rika met me at the bottom of the stairs with a blank expression.

(------)

_Shorter than usual, but that's okay. It took a long time to finally get up._

_Here's hoping the next chapter will be sooner!_

_Rika195_


	12. Not Pity, But Pain

_These days I just don't find time to write. Sorry. But I always have inspiration for this story, so here it is. This chapter is dedicated to: _

**Rubberman2025**

**Raakshii**

**keetongu**

**Rainbow35**

**Crazyeight**

Thank you for your kind reviews and constant support. I never would get the urge to continue without you. Thanks.

_

* * *

  
_

(------)

Knowing what to say.

Why is it always so hard?

I'd always thought that it was one of my strong points, saying what needed to be said at the right time. Kazu used to tell me I was a wizard at words. But that's just one of those dumb things he says that makes me laugh.

Still…

You'd think that would be easy to talk to everyone…to know how to tell them that I'm not dead. That I'm a fairy.

But it wasn't easy. I felt dread just thinking about it. How could I stand there in the room while they all talked about me, when probably most of them couldn't even see or hear me? And then what of the ones that could? How could I explain it to them?

I didn't know if I could do it.

_Rika…If it wasn't so important to you, I wouldn't be there when you talk about me. But I promised Renamon I'd be there for you, and I wont back down on that promise. Somehow, I'll find the words to say. _I sighed as I stared down at her. I was hovering in the air a few inches, just because it felt good, so I had to look down to see her face. She wasn't moving, blinking, or even breathing. But then…neither was anything else. For just a brief moment, I was standing outside of time.

I just wanted a few moments to ponder things on my own, before returning to the daunting prospect of this meeting.

_I'll find the words, _I thought again. Though my stomach felt heavy with dread. _At least I know what to say to Jeri, and that's most important right now. But Henry…Kazu…Kenta…_I hesitated before adding, _…and Ryo. _I frowned and tried to figure out why I was annoyed with him. I didn't have any reason for it. _What will I say to them? What if they don't see me? Will it hurt, knowing that my best friends don't believe in me? _

The thought made me feel worse. _Even if it does, I'll still be there. _

I looked up and took a breath of air, and time flowed back around me. I nodded to Rika and tried to smile. "So, what's the word?"

"They're all coming," Rika answered, face devoid of all life or emotion, except for a heaviness behind her eyes that wished she would just break down and cry.

But she wouldn't.

I head to tear my gaze away from the pain locked away in those eyes, and I opted for looking at her feet instead. "Even Henry?" I asked.

She nodded. Huh... I didn't even have to look at her face to know that she did.

"So here's how it's going to go," Rika sighed. "I'll have everyone in the family room, and we'll probably just sit and talk, and maybe eat a few snacks. You know how my Grandma is…she loves to entertain company." Another sigh. "You should be in the room, in the background. I want you to listen to what we say. You should know…" her voice choked up, but she clenched her fists and raised her chin to show that she would finish her sentence, no matter how hard it was to say. "You should know how much you meant to us…all those things we should have said to you before you…fell."

I did look up then, touched by her words. Without thinking I reached out and brushed one of her long sideburn hairs out of her face. It had caught on her nose somehow, and she hadn't bothered to move it yet. Then I smiled at her. "And it will be good for you all to move on. Even if they can't see me, you should be there for each other. That's how it's meant to be."

"I hope they see you," she whispered.

"I have a feeling Jeri will."

She looked up sharply. "How do you know?" she demanded.

I cringed, my heart aching again. Feeling hollow, I unconsciously crossed my arms across my chest. "I think she saw me, a couple days ago…yesterday…a year ago…I have no idea. Time is still something I haven't gotten back into yet. But I think she saw me at the top of the cliff. I'm not sure, but I hope she did. Because there's something I need to tell her."

Rika's breath caught in her throat. "Don't…" she started.

"I wont hurt her," I whispered. "I wont make it worse. Don't worry. You were right, and I know what to say now to make it better for her."

Her shoulders relaxed. "Well…good." She didn't really know what else to say to that. "Well come on, we should…or…I guess I should…" she paused. "What am I even saying?"

I laughed, and it helped. I stopped feeling hollow for a bit. "I think you're trying to say that we should clean up and get the house ready, right?" I floated past her toward the couch in the sitting room, and tossed a pillow at her. "Race ya!"

She threw the pillow back on the couch and made a face, but hurried to do all the cleaning before I could. We spent the rest of the morning that way, racing from room to room and straightening an almost perfectly clean house. A few newspapers here, a couple dishes and trash there…it didn't take long. Or rather, it shouldn't have, but we spent so much time fighting each other to get to the random chore we discovered that it took much longer.

Finally, we collapsed on the floor of her room, out of breath. I was still chuckling after just smothering her head in pillows to distract her from loading the dishwasher so that I could do it at lighting fast speed, but at least she got to put the pillows back. Now, everything we could think of was done. I turned my head to grin at her. "Well that was fun," I taunted.

Beside me, a smirk slowly spread across Rika's face. She was out of breath from fighting for chores, and though I was lying on the floor next to her like I was out of breath too, I was nowhere close to it. I probably could have kept doing stuff without tiring for…gosh I don't know….years! But then she punched me in the shoulder and distracted my train of thought. "You dork," she accused.

We left it at that.

As her breathing evened out through the minutes, I closed my eyes and filled my senses with the feel of the house and the people in it. It was quiet, but the wood hummed with the feeling of relief and joy. It was like I was experiencing what peace felt like for the first time. Except that I wasn't. I could still feel the turmoil inside of me just hidden beneath my calm exterior, threatening to break free and overwhelm me. But around me, the house itself reverberated with the peaceful feeling of relief. I pondered it for a while, wondering what it meant.

My only conclusion was that Rika's house itself—the people, the wood, the whole thing in its entirety—was filled with and giving off the feeling of liberation. If houses could speak, this one would probably be sighing.

I smiled to myself as I came to my conclusion, amused that I was personifying Rika's house, but that's what it felt like to me. Probably the actuality was that Rika herself was starting to feel better, and for the first time in a year, there had been laughter in the house. And the reason for her Grandmother's absolute silence in the next room was probably because she didn't want to ruin it.

I hoped it would only get better from here. Even though I knew that my friends would never really get over my…death…there could still be healing between them. It gave me such relief that I sighed along with the humming of the house that no one but I could hear.

"_I wish…" _

My eyes snapped open. I turned my head and there she was, propped up by her elbow looking at me. Her face was blank, her eyes clouded with deep-held thoughts, she didn't even blink when mine met hers.

My heart raced inside of me, building up momentum for the words that might come out, the wish in her heart that I could hear, even though she wasn't speaking it at all. But it was inside her, bursting at the seams. I would grant it without even thinking if she but finished her thought.

But I had to ruin it.

"What do you wish?" I whispered, unable to stand the waiting. A wish left unfinished made me feel anxious, like it would never happen. It hurt almost as much as disbelief.

Well, not that much.

Rika did blink then, and her eyes focused. "What?" she asked, sounding confused. "Did you just ask me what I wish?" She rolled her eyes with a chuckle. "You're alive. I think I'm done with selfish wishes.

Annoyance making me agitated, I stood up and started pacing. What an irritating feeling….unfinished wishes. It was like having a dream and then killing it because you didn't believe it could happen. I decided then and there I hated unfinished wishes.

"What's wrong?" Rika demanded. "What did I say?"

"Nothing," I lied. But she could tell. Sighing agitatedly, I continued. If I thought about it more, I might find it strange that I was willing to oblige her no matter how I felt, but I wasn't thinking about it. "It's just…you seemed like you wanted to wish for something, and then you didn't. It's kind of annoying."

For some reason that was really funny to her. A mean smirk twisting her face, she opened her mouth and said, "I wish…." And then stopped.

I barely stopped myself from punching through her wall.

"Huh…what do I wish?" she went on after a minute. "Hmmm. Maybe…uh…no…no I've got nothing. Can't come up with anything. I don't wish."

"Rika…."

She laughed at my almost growl. "Oh Takato…does it really bother you that much? Maybe I should do this more often…"

"Why?" I pleaded. "What did I do? Just tell me!"

My outburst made her laugh openly. "It's so funny!" she wheezed, trying to talk while overtaken by silent guffaws. "You're so….funny! Ha ha!"

It wasn't very funny to me, but I softened up at seeing her rolling on the floor in laughter. It died down too fast.

"Oh stop it," she huffed, done laughing. She stood up and scowled defiantly at me."

"Stop what?" I asked quietly.

"THAT!" She pointed at my face. "It doesn't befit you."

"Befit?" I chuckled. "What doesn't?"

"That _stupid _smile. That: 'oh Rika, I pity you because you're sad so it makes me feel happy inside to see you laugh' smile. Puh-LEEZE. I don't need your pity. If anyone needs pity it's YOU."

Ouch. I bit my lip and looked at the floor. "I didn't want to fall off that cliff," I countered in a small voice. But then I sighed. "Never mind all this. I didn't realize my smile bugged you, and no it wasn't pity it was lov…" I clamped my mouth shut, but not fast enough.

"It was what?" Rika demanded, somewhat amused and taken back at the same time. "Lov… you mean Love? It was love? Is that what you're saying?"

"Not…LOVE, love…" I groaned, slapping my forehead. I was blushing like mad. "I mean…of course I love you Rika…you're one of absolute best friends ever…I mean heck, you're the only one I can talk to! But it's just that I care for you, and it hurts when you're sad so yes it does make me happy when I hear you laugh! Okay?"

"Uh huh." Rika rolled her eyes. "Say what you like, Takato, but I know what I heard."

"You…" I pointed my finger at her, then dropped it with a huff.

"That's what I thought," Rika concluded smugly. But before either of us could say anything else, the door bell rang twice.

We froze, staring wide-eyed at each other as the mood suddenly darkened.

They were coming.

"I'll get the door," Rika whispered. "You…"

"Wait here?" I whispered. She nodded, so I nodded back.

Slowly, she left the room and headed for the front door, leaving me to wonder what in the world I was going to do if they saw me.

And if they didn't.

(------)

_Shorter than usual, but that's okay. It took a long time to finally get up._

_Here's hoping the next chapter will be sooner!_

_Rika195_


	13. The Dream

_It's so hard to find time to write when you get older. Life seems to manage my time more than I do. But here is another chapter to let you know that I haven't forgotten my stories, nor will I ever, I imagine. Thanks for your patience! This chapter is dedicated to: _**Rubberman2025**, **Raakshii**_, _**Crazyeight**_, and _**plutomoon2**_ for your reviews and your appreciated reminders to not leave this story (among others) left unfinished. Have a wonderful month, my dear friends! And enjoy._

(-)

A moment.

So many of these happen it's hard to tell when one ends and another begins, and yet so easily they can get left behind. Worse, they can be missed altogether, and the depth that could have been gained by appreciating them will never have had a chance to occur.

As I waited breathlessly for Rika to walk toward the door and answer the doorbell, I realized that this was one of those moments. My fear, should I choose to let it control me, was on the brink of causing me to run away and hide. I didn't want to confront my friends, hear what they had to say, and then deal with them seeing me or not.

But if I lasted through it, what would I gain?

I watched her open the door as though in slow motion, anticipating who would be there, and tried to concentrate on breathing.

It was worth it. Somehow, it was worth it.

Wasn't it?

It surprised me to see that everyone was there. Kazu, Kenta, Henry, Suzie, Jeri and even Ryo. They had come together, or had met up outside and hesitated before entering, as thought they couldn't bear to do this unless they all entered at once.

I smiled secretly to myself. How like them. If Rika had been among them though, she probably wouldn't have waited.

"Come in," she told them, and as they walked into her house and took off their shoes, she motioned for them to follow them into the living room.

The room where I was standing nervously.

_What if they couldn't see me?_

_What if they could!?_

I realized for a second that because I was afraid, I had slipped out of time as they know it, letting it slow until it was almost stopped. This was a huge moment for me, and I was tempted to just run. But…

I inserted myself back into time, determined to deal with whatever happened. I hid in the shadows on the other side of the room like we planned, watching, and studied my friends with an anxious expression.

Kazu and Kenta were together, as always, and they appeared cheerful as they entered the room and seated themselves on the sofa. "Can't believe Rika herself invited us over!" Kazu taunted triumphantly, then elbowed Kenta in the side. "Isn't this great?"

"R-right…" Kenta agreed hesitantly. He stared at the coffee table blankly. "Great."

My heart ached as I could sense the sadness rolling off of him. He didn't want to talk about me. I could tell. _Oh Kenta…_

Henry and Suzie took a seat after that, unspeaking. It made me cringe to see them. Henry's face was so tired and worn, like he hadn't had a good night sleep in a year. I remembered what I'd overheard about him having nightmares, and it distressed me that I was the cause. This must be so hard for him…hard for everyone. Beside him, Suzie held his hand comfortingly, but she too looked sad.

Rika walked in, leading Jeri by the hand and followed by Ryo. They took a seat, and for a while everyone was silent. I just stared.

Jeri's eyes were red with tears, and she bit her lip to keep from crying. But it surprised me when I saw her expression. She looked…

Determined.

I could sense that her sadness was still great, and that the guilt she felt had in no way lessened. But something else had taken root in her heart. It felt like hope.

As for Ryo…

I didn't really want to look at him, for some reason. It was kind of weird, and inwardly scolding myself, I studied him carefully.

He was very quiet, looking calm and concerned, but he studied Rika with a calculating expression that seemed to show that he was surprised by her expression. But he was also glad. I could feel his relief from where I hid, and it made me wonder. How much did he care for Rika? Did he love her? Could he tell that she had hope again? If so, it seemed to encourage him.

It made me glad too.

Glad…and jealous.

"You all know why I've called you here," Rika began, getting straight to the point. She never did beat around the bush. "We need to talk about Takato."

Everyone winced, like hearing my name was adding salt to an open wound. I placed a hand on my aching chest. My friends….I couldn't bear it!

"I'm glad to talk about him," Jeri spoke up, surprising all of us. She sniffed and rubbed her eyes. "He was a better friend than I'd ever deserved. It's my fault that he's not here today."

"Jeri that's not…" Kazu declared, standing up almost angrily. He paused when Kenta grabbed his arm and shook his head minutely. Sighing, Kazu sat down again and let her continue.

"I know that you will tell me it's not my fault," she said shakily, the tears beginning to run faster and faster down her cheeks. "That he would have done it anyway. That things happen we can't control, and I shouldn't pretend like I was the one who made it happen. But you're wrong. I know what happened that day…because it was me who caused it."

"Jeri…" Kenta sighed, holding his forehead.

"No listen!" she cried out. "Tanako said something that upset me, so I bumped her. I didn't intend to knock her over, I just wanted to scare her. But she slipped and fell, and when we should have gotten the teacher for help, I asked Takato to climb down and save her because I felt guilty!" she held her face, shaking and crying, as we all listened in grave silence. "He wouldn't have gone down there," she whimpered. "He wouldn't have. Because he was afraid of heights, and we would have found another way to get her. The teacher came only a few minutes later with a rope, and we could have pulled her up with that, but I couldn't wait. I…I made him do it! I made him do it and he fell! He died because of me!"

She burst into sobs, no one able to comfort her. Rika held her in her arms silently, stroking her hair, but other than that no one could do anything. What were they supposed to tell her?

Only I could bring her relief. I hoped.

"Takato was my best friend," Kazu broke through the silence hesitantly, speaking over Jeri's soft sobs. "He and Kenta and I were like the three musketeers. We were inseparable. Losing him was like losing the sun." He hung his head, trembling. "I was…I was angry when fell. I blamed you for his death, even though I knew that I was being irrational. I blamed you, and I hated you!"

Jeri sobbed harder. "I know," she cried. "It's fine…I…"

"No listen!" he interrupted. "It's not like that anymore! I can't blame you for what happened, no matter what anyone says. I just can't! I keep dreaming about it, remembering what happened, and no matter how many times I try to hold onto my anger at you, it just vanishes because…because I knew Takato! And Takato wouldn't have blamed you!"

Jeri's sob choked in her throat, and she was silent for a moment, listening.

"Takato wouldn't have blamed you," Kazu repeated, wiping his eyes. "And so neither can I. I don't know how much good this will do, but I'll say it anyway. I forgive you, Jeri, and I don't hate you. And I will always be here for you, as your friend, as long as I live. Because that's what Takato would have done."

"Kazu!" Jeri cried, her tears increasing as her sobs wracked her body. This time, however, they were sobs of relief.

I wiped my own eyes, overwhelmed by what I was hearing. _I don't deserve friends like you, _I thought emotionally.

After a while, Jeri was able to stop crying. Though they were quietly thinking to themselves for a while, it seemed like the ice had been broken. And soon, they began to talk to each other, everyone telling their part.

It was something that meant they were beginning to heal.

Kenta's story was similar to Kazu's, and he too wanted Jeri to know that he forgave her, and would always be there for her. Suzie spoke about how much I meant to her, how much she looked up to me, and how she was at the bakery when the news came about my death. She said she always felt helpless, like she couldn't comfort my parents or her brother, or even herself. But she would always try to remind herself about the good things I had brought to her life. Ryo too, spoke about how much I had impacted him. I reminded him about how precious life was, how kindness was just as valuable as strength, and how he'd forgotten those things while he was in the digital world. Even now, he still felt encouraged by my memory. Even Rika spoke about me.

Henry was the last to say anything. His face was gaunt and tired, and when everyone had finished talking, they turned to look at him expectantly. It caused a shiver to travel through his body.

"If you can't talk about him right now, it's okay," Rika whispered. "I wont force you. But thank you…for coming. We needed this."

Henry's eyes opened slowly—he had closed them when he shuddered—and he stared at everyone in the circle with a tired expression. "I'm sorry," he said slowly. "I can't talk about him like he's dead."

I froze, listening, and noticed that Rika seemed just as struck by his words.

"He is dead," Kazu said sadly, speaking through gritted teeth.

Henry's eyes flashed darkly. "I can't believe that," he snapped. "I wont."

For a second, everyone stared at him in alarm. And then with pity.

But Rika's eyes were wide with shock. "Henry," she whispered. "You…"

He closed his eyes, trembling, and Suzie tried to comfort him. "I had a dream the night he fell," he said. "A dream that repeats every time I fall asleep. In my dream, Takato fell into an alternate world, through a rift that can't be seen with our eyes, though we can still enter it by chance. He was transformed by magic, and survived." Eyes opening in a flash, he glared at all of them. "And I know that it is true."

The color drained from Jeri's face. "Transformed?" she squeaked. Suddenly she dashed forward, grabbing Henry's hands. "What did he look like? Can you describe him?"

Surprised, Henry pulled back a little. "Easily," he said. "I dream it every night."

"Tell me!" she demanded.

Hesitantly, Henry did. "His eyes are the same, so is his face, but his hair is a little redder. He wears weird clothes of red, white and silver, and has wings on his back. Two of them are like flame, the other two like crystals of ice."

Kazu and Kenta exchanged glanced. "So…you mean he got changed into a digimon?" they asked.

"That doesn't sound like a digimon," Ryo frowned.

"No, not a digimon," Rika agreed. But before she could explain, Jeri suddenly screamed.

"I saw him!" she declared, standing and holding her head with eyes so wide, they might have fallen out of her face. "I saw him on the mountain, at the spot where he fell! He looked exactly like that!"

"When?" Kazu exclaimed.

"On the anniversary of his death, three days ago!" she yelled. "It was him, it really was! Henry….he _is _alive! He must be!"

Henry nodded once, gravely. "He's alive," he insisted. "But that's not all. My dream continues from there."

Suddenly the room was silent, and everyone listened in shock. I too, listened with bewilderment.

"Takato is alive," Henry continued, "but he isn't human anymore. He's been transformed by magic, and there are evil beings out to destroy him. My dream is the same every night. He comes here to talk to us, to tell us he's alive because he can't bear to live without us, but as soon as he does, he is captured by something evil." He paused, meeting each one of their eyes. "And then he dies."

I felt sick to my stomach, and real fear gripped my heart like a vice. Henry's dream had been true so far, so that meant…

I couldn't come out to speak to them. I may already be in danger.

What was it that the fairies had told me? That evil fairies would sense my power and come looking for me? Was it already too late?

"You don't mean," Ryo began.

Henry nodded. "I do. Takato is here. That's why Rika called us here, isn't it?"

They glared at her accusingly, and she raised her hands defensively. "Hey now," she said quickly. "Takato did die as a human. We all have grief that we need to deal with. That hasn't changed, and I still want us to be able to speak as friends like we used to. But he did get changed into something magical, and he does want you guys to see him. The only thing is…"

"Takato!" Kazu suddenly yelled. "Get out here! How could you hide yourself from us? Do you think we'd reject you? You jerk!"

I cringed. What should I do?

Henry stood. "We can't protect him," he said quickly. "Not now. But we'll get the chance to speak to him later. Run, Takato. Run back to that place where you'll be safe before it's too late!"

I didn't wait any second longer. "I'm sorry," I whispered to them, willing for them to hear me, and then flew so fast I could barely see where I was going.

By the time I made it back to the realm of the fairies and the mansion where I now lived, I was trembling in terror.

What was out to get me? And was it already too late?

I hoped and prayed that by hiding here, I would not lose any more years in the mortal world.

Suddenly Samas was beside me, looking alarmed. "What's wrong?" she asked, studying me. "Why are you holding yourself in Time? It isn't healthy, you know. You age a lot faster that way."

"I was going to speak to my friends," I explained, shaking. I couldn't understand what was wrong with me. Normally I should have been fine. Wasn't it more important to be there for my friends than to run like a coward? How selfish could I get? Still, my new instincts that had been instilled in me when I became a fairy were warning me of the danger. I knew that if I was captured, my magic would be used for horrible purposes. I couldn't allow that to happen.

"You shouldn't do that!" she insisted, growing upset. "It's not safe out in the open like that. Besides, that life is over, you should just leave them behind and let them get on with their lives."

"They already know I'm alive," I argued. "Henry dreamt it! Every night he's had the same dream, that I was turned into a fairy and that I'm alive. But he also dreamt that I'm in danger, and that something evil is out to get me. Before I had the chance to talk to them, he ordered me to run home as fast as I could, so I did."

"Something evil?" Samas whispered, then her eyes widen. "A recurring dream? A truthful dream? Dominic…."

"Dominic?" I asked, growing confused. I didn't know what she was saying.

"Domimic is the Dream Fairy. He gives people visions for dreams sometimes, when it is urgent. If he has been giving your friend that dream then it must be true. But why would this evil be after you so soon after you were born?"

Born? I ignored the strangeness of the term for the moment, and grimacing, decided that I would show her exactly why. "Because of this," I said, and holding out my hand, caused my sphere to appear in it.

I handed the sphere to her and flew to my room so that I could be alone, ignoring the expression of surprise and horror on her face.

(-)

_SORRY! I have taken forever to update! Really, it's because I'm 25 now and I hardly have time to write anymore, but I should never leave a story unfinished. It just isn't right. So thank you to my dear reviewers, if I even have any left. I promise to continue this soon. At least for the sake of finishing it._

_~Rika195_


End file.
